So I am 20F and i always grew up with animals, ai am a big animal lover i even have a tattoo of my previous cat and I just can’t imagine a life without an animal beside me, my bf on the other hand has an allergy for all kind of pet hairs or hair in general even if i rub my face on his skin his skin get irritated and because of that he doesn’t really like animals. Now I want to move with him but I want to get a cat because i need an animal with me in my house and I know a lot of people who take medicine daily for reducing allergies. Am i the asshole for telling him i only want to move with him if we have a pet and making him take medicine for it?
Edit: Maybe i should add a bit of context bcs i saw a lot of mesaages, his allergy is not that severe that he would need an epi pen he just gets his eyes irritated and is gard breathing trough his nose kinda like a a cold and very important thing!! A few months ago we stayed at a friend for about a week who had 11 cats and he was doing really good with medicine and after a few days he began to become more immune to the allergy and didn’t need pills that frequently lr could go days without taking one
I’ll just say this might be an incompatibility issue. Me and my brother grew up with cats. He went off to college, came back having developed a pet hair allergy. Every time he comes home, he’s miserable. He takes allergy meds, but they’re nowhere near effective enough. His best option is letting the Benadryl knock him out for most of the visit. Don’t assume daily meds are a solution.
YTA – if his allergies are bad enough that the indirect touching of your skin that was in contact with an animal, already causes him to break out, they are severe and would require a lot of medication to manage. Plus it’s not like “taking some pills” magically makes all allergies just go away, many people still suffer with symptoms and/or side effects of the medication.
If you cannot imagine a life without a pet in your home, you cannot have a partner who is severely allergic to animals. So you need to make a choice.
You don’t care about you bf’s allergies? Would it be okay for him not to care about your health and wellbeing just because he wants something?
YTA. If you want to live with an animal that badly then you may as well call time on this relationship and find someone who shares your desires or at least can put up with it without having to be uncomfortable and pumping themselves with meds just to sit in their own home when it’s avoidable