I’m having a sip and see (party for family to see baby after they’re born; we didn’t have a baby shower when I was pregnant).
I \[28F\] don’t like my grandmother’s \[87F\] boyfriend \[77M\]. He’s of a certain divisive opinion, he’s ingratiated himself into our family too much for my liking, and he doesn’t have a relationship with his own children and grandchildren because he got remarried to his (now deceased) second wife 8 months after his first wife died. He started dating my grandmother three months after his second wife died and he has been giving my grandmother his dead wife’s jewelry.
My grandmother and I used to be very close, but her behavior since my grandfather died in 2021 has changed how I feel about her. We are not close at all now.
I was the only grandchild out of six that helped my grandparents. My grandparents live an hour away and I would regularly drive to get them and bring them to our city for doctor appointments and then take them back home (I work for my parents, but still, I had to take off work the whole day). I was the only grandkid that quarantined for COVID so I could visit them and do their grocery shopping. And I regularly did fixes, projects, and repairs on their house (I’m a contractor).
My grandmother knows very well how my parents and I feel about her boyfriend and about her behavior.
For the party, I addressed the envelope to only her name at her house only. Boyfriend doesn’t live there. I figured she’d still bring him, but maybe would possibly see this as an opportunity to have just a family event. Since my grandfather died, she has had a boyfriend at \*every\* single holiday and family party or gathering; we literally cannot spend time with JUST her).
Well, she got super mad. Called my mom about how disrespectful it was to leave her boyfriend off the envelope (even though, again, he doesn’t even live there). And she declined to come to the party.
This doesn’t actually bother me all that much, but I feel bad for my mom as this has now put her in a tough spot with her mom and sisters (and other family). My mom doesn’t have the strongest convictions and prefers to just have everyone get along.
TL;DR: AITA for not inviting my grandmother’s boyfriend, whom I dislike, to a family event?