So, one of my close friends, M (23F), got married this past weekend. We’re part of a friend group of six, and we’re all pretty close, but M only had one maid of honor and didn’t want any additional bridesmaids, so I (24F) just went as a regular guest.
Here’s the thing, I’ve always loved very fancy outdoor weddings, like at a really nice venue in the mountains, beach, a nice ranch, things like that. Hers was in a hotel ballroom, which is more typical and not really my vibe. I’ve been to those more typical weddings before, and know that I don’t tend to find them that fun.
The ceremony was at a church, and the reception was a couple hours after the ceremony and was at a different location. After the ceremony, I talked to the bride and groom. And then as I was walking out the door (like everyone else was at the time), I also quickly said to M that I wasn’t going to be at the reception but still hoped she would have fun, and I walked out the door. I decided to head home, since I didn’t think I’d have much fun at the reception.
A few hours later, someone from our friend group texted me saying M told her I left and that they all thought it was rude, and that I was being selfish. Apparently M was pretty upset about it too. I honestly think people are making it a bigger deal than it really is.
AITA?
YTA this can’t be real
YTA If you’d told them up front you’d only be at the ceremony it would have been fine but now they bought you a meal and potentially left someone else off the list for nothing.
YTA.
If this is legitimate – guess what? When you care for someone, you show up for someone.
Not “Oh I’d go to dinner with you to celebrate, but I don’t like that restaurant” not “oh see I’d be happy to celebrate your birthday but I think your party location is low-class” and certainly not “I’d love to celebrate your wedding except I think your reception is going to be boring”.
It’s not about you. Check the main character energy and show up for the people in your life – otherwise, do not be surprised when people in your life stop showing up for you.
YTA – especially if you RSVPd you would be there. They charge for the number of guests. You owe her an apology especially using the excuse ‘its not my vibe because i only like fancy weddings’. Spoiler alert, its not for you, its for the marrying couple to celebrate with friends and family. So dumb and your friend deserves better friends.
YTA. When you RSVP’d for this wedding, that undoubtedly included both ceremony and reception. This means the couple paid for your seat, food, and drink at the reception and you wasted their money.
YTA. Did you RSVP to go to the reception? If so that adds to you being TA as they would have included you in the count for catering purposes.That is money they spent on you only to essentially be told f you all because you didn’t like their choice of venue as it wasn’t your “vibe”. You could have at least gone for a little while and just left early.
Yta, close friend? You are just sour she didn’t choose you as a bridesmaid. She knew what she was doing it seems.
YTA…not only did you only partially show up for a friend, but you then stuck her with the cost of your attendance. Many don’t realize that you have to pay for your head count prior to the wedding. You RSVPd so she paid for you. Weddings aren’t cheap…and if you end up only attending weddings that “are your vibe” you’ll quickly find yourself without friends
YTA we dont attend friend’s weddings to havw fun. We attend them to be part of their special day and share the joy.
1. Your reason is so lame. You dont know the future.. maybe you would have liked it. The least you could have done is gone for 30 minutes and then make an exit with a good excuse. Really have you never sat through a bad movie? Would it have really sucked to tolerate two non-fun hours for the sake of your friend and be rewarded with food and cake in the horrifying indoors. But okay I will ignore this because sure you are adamant you wont enjoy .
2. Still TA because your friend spent money for you to be part of the reception. You should have RSVPd differently and not sprung this on her last minute. I hope you are not telling anyone the real lame reason because it could hurt the bride that someone didnt come because their wedding was not lavish enough.
YTA. The reception isn’t about you having fun, it’s about celebrating the couple
“Not really my vibe”
It ain’t about what your vibe is. She’s supposedly a close friend that you barely gave a shit about. Her biggest day and you had to upset her.
YTA for being so damn shallow and arrogant.
YTA. Hey EVERYONE Theres an unwritten wedding rule that on the day of the wedding you ONLY tell the bride/groom “congratulations.”
Don’t bother them if your late (unless your in the party but then thats what MOH/BM are for)
Don’t tell them your leaving
Dont tell them you don’t like the music
Don’t tell them the food is too spicy
Don’t tell them the venue ran out of ice.
Just don’t tell them ANYTHING cause WTF ARE THEY GONNA DO?!?!?!!?
Cause M did the only thing she could do with this information: be mad about it
Give nuptial couple the gift of it happening like they envisioned. Even if it isn’t.
YTA??? God forbid someone else’s wedding is not your vibe, it isn’t about you. It is about supporting the people you love and you didn’t. You have no valid excuse lmao this is so sad.
Yeah, YTA.
You say she’s one of your closest friends, but you didn’t go to the reception, because it didn’t fit your exact ” vibe ” . You don’t have fun thanks to a venue. So yeah, it was very rude.
Guess what. Good people don’t skip a close friend’s wedding reception because the venue isn’t Instagrammable enough. Only AHs do.