I‘ve always had problems with my skin, I have pimples and my skin just isn’t smooth. I also have a habit of picking my skin and popping my pimples which I know I shouldn’t do. But I started taking care of my skin a while ago and it has gotten much better, but there were periods where I would stop and then start again.
So this past week I’ve been taking caring of my skin again and my mom who has always commented on my skin(which I know she does for my own good) touches my face, grabs my chin and says “see, when you start taking care of your skin it looks much better” which was a compliment but then she just grabs my whole face and starts touching it.
What I meant with “she has always commented on my skin” I mean: everytime I pick my skin she says “what have you done now, why are you making yourself ugly by doing that?” and she just inspects my face very often and touches it.
I don’t know if she understands that touching my your face makes it dirty, because she has perfect skin. Everytime I tell her “can you please not touch my face” she says “my hands are always clean!” and she gets offended.
Well this time when she touched my face and grabbed my chin I told her very nicely again to not touch my face while I had my cat on my lap. And then again she says how clean her hand s are. But then I tell her that even I don’t touch my face. Then she says that after touching the cat I touch my face a bunch, which I don’t do. But I guess she just still gets offended and tells me that I shouldn’t be like that. Is it that hard to respect my wishes, even if you don’t understand why?
NTA! People have boundaries, even if it’s a child and parent situation. You’re expressing your boundaries like you should.
NTA. Do it back. She’ll hate it. As soon as her hands are in your face start touching her the same way. It’s about ownership so she won’t like it from you and will have to back off or she’ll be within touching range.
this, she does it because she thinks she owns you, don’t let it slide.
NTA. You set a boundary and she crossed it. Your face is your body, and _you_ are the one who has final say.
NTA. It’s your face, and it’s weird she feels the need to touch it enough for this to even be an issue.
NTA but grab her face and see how long it takes her to leave you alone.
NTA – you get to tell people you don’t want to be touched, period.
NTA..You set your boundaries
Nta you set a boundary and she didn’t respect it. Worse got angry at you for defending said boundary.
My physical boundaries from my mother are guarded with fists not words these days as she didn’t seem to speak English with regards to my hair.
Lick her face. She’ll be too scared to get close enough to you again to touch it. Tell her your tongue is clean if she protests.
NTA but just curious, does your mom only touch your face or is that a thing she does with everyone?
She could be doing a full surgical scrub, but the moment she touches something, anything, they are dirty again. Hands can look very clean, but they aren’t.
Clean or dirty hands aside, you are no longer a toddler. Touching you without permission is invasive and rude. You’ve made it clear you don’t want your face touched. The second she touches your face, tell her she doesn’t have permission to touch your face then turn around and walk away. Go to your room, go for a walk, whatever. Just don’t stay. Be gone for at least 10-15 minutes.
NTA. Tell her that it doesn’t matter how clean her hands are, you don’t want your face being touched.
Alternatively, touch her face like she touches yours.
For the record, I’m 40 and STILL pop/mess with my pimples. Maybe have you tried saying “Mom, I love you, you know I do, but all I ask if that you respect my personal space, which you are currently invading. Let me deal with this matter on my own, that’s all I ask”