My sister has three kids. The oldest lives with my parents and has their entire life. The youngest two live with my sister. I have two kids of my own. Our town does not has bus transportation for kids that live in town or out of district limits.
At the beginning of Christmas break, my sister’s car broke down. My dad drove it to a shop where its been sitting ever since. The day it broke down, my sister was given my dad’s vehicle to borrow. My parents have two vehicles and my dad is retired, so for the length of Christmas break, it wasnt a huge issue. My mom works 7 out of every 14 days, 3 days one week, 4 days the next.
I told my dad before NYE that if my sister still didnt have a car by the time school started, she’d have to figure out transportation for the kids that live with her for days that my mom works. My husband and I share a vehicle, and he leaves for work immediately after I get home from picking up our kids. We live right down the road from my parents, so picking up and dropping off the child that lives with them isnt a big deal. My sister lives in a different city and pays public transit to bring her kids to the schools in our town every day, but doesnt have them take the public transit home, and at least once a week relies on my father to pick up her kids and take them home.
Today came the day I knew was coming, my mom has to work, my dad has no vehicle, and my sister’s middle kid need a ride home from school. My sisters youngest is at the dads today, so thats covered. My sister never figured out transport for the middle child. My car cannot safely fit 3 across in the back seat with carseats and booster seats, so the only kid I have room to pick up is the one that lives with my parents. I dont have time to make multiple trips to the schools before my husband leaves for work, and will not transport more kids than is safe to do so. Roads and sidewalks are clear of snow, it’s above freezing, and the walk from the school to my parents house is less than a mile. They’ve walked to my parents from school before, its not new to them. So I told both my parents and my sister that she’ll have to walk home, like I said well before today got here. Im being told my husband can leave late for work, and that I have a grudge against my sister so im refusing to help her and taking it out on her child.
AITA?
To be clear: the middle child needs to get to my parents house, not her house in another town. My parents set it up eith me beforehand to bring the oldest to their house, my sister waited until 2 hours before school got out to message me.
NTA. You warned them well before it happened, and they don’t get to determine if your husband is late for work. Lack of planning on their part is not your emergency, especially with that much time and warning.
Your husband cannot just be late, that’s not a thing. Your sister is responsible for figuring out transport for her kids, and any help she gets from you or your parents is a bonus, not a right. NTA.
NTA Not your sister should have sorted transportation out for HER child. It’s her responsibility, no one else’s!
Honestly, it’s on your parents and sister to sort out. While they offered parental kindness to your sister, thy chose to raise the oldest grandchild and lend out their car. Now they’re trying to make you feel guilty and say your husband can just be late to work? No.
Or op’s mom can be late for work or leave early to get the kid
My mom works 6am-6pm so that doesnt work in this scenario lol. But my sister did manage to leave work and get her kid!
so basically, she waited until two hours before school let out to try to strongarm you and force you to pick up her kid when you had already said a clear no in advance?
That is correct
NTA. Your sister needs to handle it instead of expecting your husband to go into work late. Why can’t the child walk, since they have before? Your sister needs to get her crap together and get her car fixed.
The only reason they say she cant walk is because its winter and cold. But like I said in my post, its above freezing, roads and sidewalks are all clear of ice and snow. And the child has a coat.
Yeah, I grew up in very cold climates and walked many times as a kid. As long as she has a winter coat, with a hood, she should be fine.
NTA
Your sister had weeks to get something figured out. And your parents had weeks to figure something out since they appear to enable her so much.
You’ve been told your husband can go to work late. Hahahahahahaha
Sister: You have been told to figure transportation out. Expecting my husband to go to work late for your convenience is the dumbest thing you’ve said in a while. YOU can leave work early to get your child if said child can’t walk. Here is a novel thought, get your car fixed so you aren’t inconveniencing mom and dad reducing them to one car.
> the walk is less than a mile
NTA
I’m too European for this.