I’ll try to make that one quick.
I (17M) live with my mom and my sister (22). Sometimes my cousin (18F) and grandma come over to spend time with us. When they do come over they stay during whole weeks.
Every time that anyone needs anything, I’m the one being called. When it’s about refilling ppl’s water bottles, I’m being called. When my mom is too lazy to pay bills, I’m the one called to do it for her.
When anyone is too lazy to buy something from the grocery store, they send me to buy it for them.
I have a lot of other examples but I’m basically the servant of the whole family since I was little.
Recently, I decided that I had enough when my mom ordered me to re-design her Resume as if it wouldn’t take my an entire hour from my day.
So I politely declined and told her that I didn’t like the way she was talking to me.
She then got mad menacing my of not giving me any money like she does every month.
My Grandma asked me to MANUALLY transfer every contacts of her old phone to her new one as if this wouldn’t take forever. And I declined then she basically crashed out.
I’m always asked to help everyone but I’m never help. And ppl are always telling me that I’m useless in this house for not wanting to do housework.
I’m basically revolting against everyone in this house and I somehow feel bad for it.
AITA for revolting ?
NTA make sure you keep shining up that spine and get a job so you can save and get out as soon as you can. And don’t tell anyone you have a job either, they seem like to type to try and take your whole check
NTA, but it sounds more like they don’t respect your time, rather than you’re not willing to help out. I think if you frame it in that way, (if true) then it might go over better.
I remember when I was 17 and my parents would just command me to do stuff and not even bother to ask if I had something else planned. It was just complete disregard for anything I might’ve had scheduled that upset me more than doing tasks.
Absolutely not the asshole. Nobody should be treated as a servant like that to your entire family
NTA- you are standing up for yourself! Well done!
NTA It’s hard to set boundaries with family so well done standing up for yourself
Oh, honey, I’m so sorry. You’re obviously NTA. You said nothing about your father’s side of the family. Can they be of any help to you? If not, please consider talking to someone you think you can trust at your school.
When do you turn 18? It’s quite soon, I hope. Do you have a plan in place for moving out? I suggest you begin to gather up your important documents, and, as so many Redditors recommend, lock down your credit.
Please take good care of yourself and remember, you are valuable and loved by this stranger who has been where you are today. ❤️ 🫂
Your family is riddled with entitled mentality…
If you give in now they will never change.
You need to stand your ground FOR YOU
The only person in the world that will always 💯 look out for your best interest is yourself!
NTA at all. It sounds like your (all female) family may have some toxic ideas around gender expectations. Some old-fashioned thinking is all about men “taking care of things”, and, as a boy, you may be getting the short end of that stick, so to speak.
Regardless of where this is coming from, it’s not okay. You shouldn’t have had those expectations on you, should have had room to be a child. While it’s important for you (and any child) to learn how to be generous and how to do basic up-keep things like cooking, laundry, cleaning, that doesn’t mean it should be your *role* in the family, officially or unofficially. Paying bills for your mom and doing her resume is especially not in the realm of what’s reasonable for a parent to expect from her child! I guess the silver lining is that you will be a capable and independent adult, but still…
You could start to offer “help” in the form of suggestions. “Oh, online, you can find really good templates for resumes. I’ll help you find one so you can clean yours up.” Or “If you take your phones to the (carrier) store, they can move all of your data over for you. I’ll help you locate the nearest store.”
Find a job. Move out
At 17, if OP is in the US, he can’t move out until he’s of age or is emancipated, and even then, unless it’s to a friend’s place while under 18, he can’t legally sign a lease anywhere.
NTA. The adults need to grow TF up.
Just gradually pull back. Small things,do them. Bigger, time consuming tasks, sorry too busy right now.
“I’m useless?, then it won’t matter if I don’t do it.” Tell them that this is good practice for when you don’t live there any more.