I 29F am a MOH for my best friend as well as her sister 35F. I have 2 under 2 kids.
I have explicitly stated that I can only stay one night. I even said in the group bachelorette text that I can stay one night (again) and that I could pay my share for that night and help with the brides portion
She booked an Airbnb anyways and said “if we all split evenly, it would be ____ and if anyone drops it will be more”
So basically I would have to pay double and only be there one night which makes no sense to me.
I texted her privately stating it AGAIN and she hasn’t responded. AITA for refusing to split an AIRBNB evenly if I’m only staying one night?
Edit: I should add that I am throwing the bride a bridal shower and fronting the entire cost for that as well
INFO – how long was it booked for?
Are there activities that are going on making the bachelorette ‘event’ requiring the Airbnb for longer and you personally just can’t stay the full time?
Are your kids there too? Are your best friend and her sister both getting married? Or are you AND the sister both MOH’s? Very confusing the way it was written,
If they had to get an airbnb for (2-3 nights?) due to the bachelorette activiites lasting that long and you’re not taking part in the whole thing, they had to get a place big enough even if you were only staying hte one night, and they’d have to move to a smaller place the second night? That doesn’t make sense either.
If they get another person to stay in your room, then sure your cost can be reduced.
Anyway, more info needed
Don’t go
NTA
There’s two things at play here, the cost of an AirBNB is essentially size times nights. So by you being there, the cost increases even for the nights you’re not there.
The other guests are rightfully entitled to not want to pay for your space for your unused night. And you are rightfully entitled to not want to pay for that either. So the obvious solution was to not book an AirBNB that had that extra space.
The solutions that would have made sense were to book a hotel with adjoining rooms or a smaller AirBNB and you sleep on couch for your one night. But the reason for the NTA verdict is that the bride booked the bigger AirBNB after you already made your position clear. Not your decision, not your problem, not the AH
YTA
they will ned to get an AirBnB with a bed for you – and it needs to be paid for all nights, even if it is unused.
If oyu want one night, get a hotel room.
Sort of ESH because regardless of how many nights you are staying, they had to book a space that accommodated enough people to start with and you are now asking them to eat that cost for the second night. Like if you are sleeping there they need a space that can sleep x number of people, they can’t move to a smaller place that might have been cheaper just because you are leaving and they aren’t getting a discount on the stay when you leave and are essentially paying for your empty bed. It would be nice if they wanted to but I get why they wouldn’t.
YTA it’s not their problem that you can only stay for one night. Either go or don’t, but if you go you have to pay your share
Soft YTA. I get how it doesn’t feel fair to you, but it’s also not fair to the rest of the group to have to pay extra for an empty bed.
It’s not a hotel, you can’t fluctuate the cost based on how many people are there each night.
So if you want to be there at all, you have to understand that they need to get an Airbnb big enough to include you.
NTA
Ask yourself the following:
Is it cheaper to pay for a hotel room for the night or is it cheaper to pay the ABNB split?
If it is cheaper to pay for a hotel for the night, I would either go stay in a hotel room for the night or offer to pay the hotel room cost as your portion of the ABNB.
If it is cheaper to pay the ABNB split, then you might as well just pay that instead of paying for more for a hotel room.
Just don’t go
YTA because it is an airbnb, you shouldn’t have waited until it was already booked and get a hotel room nearby just for you so they could have looked for a smaller place, but now it’s already done so you should pay your share depending on number of people and not on days you are staying there.
Does it not make sense that the airbnb needs to be larger to accommodate you?
NAH if you just get a hotel room instead
YTA as everyone in r/weddingplanning has already told you. As the MOH you should be helping to plan this party, but instead you’re causing drama. You’re in the wedding, the night you’re not there, there will be an unoccupied bed and you’re expecting everyone else to just cover that for you? This isn’t a hotel. You’re being really unreasonable.
You cant just book a bed in a air b&b for one night, its not a hotel. That bed you have paid for is for the whole stay, no matter how long you are there. I’ve been in this situation many times, I always pay the same as everyone else or I stay in a hotel elsewhere.
Softly YTA.
INFO: Will you have your own bed when you stay there?