Finally found some time to vent on here after all that’s gone on today. My roommate has been going ape shit because I set this reptile that she keeps as a pet free. For context, my roommate (22f) and I(24m) live in a 2 bedroom community style apartment block in Brazil, and it’s very common to see these animals out on the veranda running around, i think it is called a gecko
So a couple months ago we were having a coffee and chatting outside and we see a baby gecko with bites on him and uneven legs so he walked funny. My roommate felt bad and sounded determined that she would raise him since she has abandonment issues which I will not go into. However, she is a pretty messy person. I make her clean the common areas and keep the kitchen tidy after she uses it, but her room is obviously a different story since that’s her private space.
over the weekend she went away to visit a friend and she asked me to take care of her reptile which was no problem for me but after seeing the state of her room and where she kept the gecko I immediately knew I had to set it free. To illustrate a little, the gecko was in a rather large card board box with air holes poked in, and inside of the box was what looked like the stuffing you put in a hamsters cage, a small water tray and a little hammock that was actually quite cute. I felt really bad just seeing it, and brought the box outside, opened it and let it be free.
Galo (the gecko) does like the veranda and has been living there in the shaded rocky area, so when my roommate got back and I told her she started freaking out at me saying I let one of her family run away. I told her these geckos are not meant to live like that and I cannot stand for it. she still hasn’t captured him again, because he was running on the walls and she couldn’t knock him off with a broom. I feel like she is being very possessive over something that should not belong to her, but she is making me feel a crazy saying the reptile is much safer in our home, aita?
ESH: If she can’t care for the pet properly, she shouldn’t have it.
You are an asshole for agreeing to care for her pet, and then “setting it free”. Let’s be honest, a deformed gecko is unlikley to have a long life in the wild.
You had plenty of time to voice your complaints before you did what you did. For that reason, you are the bigger asshole here.
The autonomy of any caged/constrained pet is not being respected. If that is the reason for freeing your roommate’s pet while she was not around, YTA.
It was not a pet. The roomate captured it from outside and put it in a box in her room. OP released it back outdoors where it came from.
Unfortunately despite your intentions, you are the AH. You sound like you just don’t like the concept of keeping pets. Plus, that gecko will probably be eaten by a predator after being kept in a box and relying on your roomie for food.
ESH
What you did was correct, but not how you did it. Releasing the gecko without telling her or talking to her first about your concerns was an asshole move, especially as a roommate. It doesn’t sound like the gecko was at risk of immediate harm, so you should have waited until she was back and talked to her.
She is a total asshole for trying to recapture the gecko by hitting it with a broom.
NTA. In many places (Brazil included), it’s illegal to take wild animals, including geckos, and keep them as pets. That is no way to keep an animal. You did the right thing.
ESH.
In general, you’d be TA, but she’s been keeping the animal inside an opaque cardboard box. That’s no way for it to live its life. She’s an AH for that.
However, you’re an AH for releasing it without first talking to her about it. This was not an emergency where time was of the essence.
NTA
Whoa, yeah, YTA.
If you truly cannot “stand for” this, then you needed to tell your roommate that *before* she left her pet in your care, not after. If you don’t agree with somebody having a pet, don’t agree to care for somebody’s pet.
I’m going to take your word for it that her cardboard box was an inappropriate environment for a gecko because I don’t know anything about reptiles, but when an animal is injured, it typically does not do well in the wild. If your concern was for the gecko’s wellbeing, you would’ve taken it to a vet or another qualified person and told that person your concerns about your roommate’s behavior.
When is a cardboard box ever appropriate environment for any animal ever to live it. His plan was to take care of it for her until he saw the living conditions.
Reptiles typically need heat lamps, UVB lamps, and (depending on the species) daily misting of water in their enclosure. So a cardboard box for a reptile would be a fire hazard and potentially, a breeding ground for mold spores if it did need the regular misting.
Based on the post, I doubt anything the gecko actually needed was set up properly to encourage good health. I would hazard a guess the gecko actually healed up a lot better and faster after being released back outside where it could get natural UVB/heat from the sun as well as eat its normal diet, plus wild animals are typically more stressed when suddenly put into captivity.
YTA. It wasn’t your place to do what you did.
YTA, its like you didnt have balls to have a conversation with her upon her return to state your case.