Hi, I’ve never used this subreddit before but I really want to get this infuriating feeling off my chest.
I (18F) am a 1st year freshman in college. I was homeschooled for my senior years so this felt like stepping out of my comfort zone. After a few months, I’ve met talented and wonderful people and I even got myself a new friend group to hangout in campus. Of course I got their Instagrams/Facebook to chat online whenever. So every time one of my friends dm me, it would ping or notify, right? Here’s the problem… my mom (45F) would receive notifications and later tell me about it. She would even read the conversations. How did that happen? Back in pandemic, I got into Discord. I’ve learned… things from there. My mom, out of curiosity, checked my device to see what this Discord is about. She was in horror to see her own daughter talking that way. She told me not to meet people that give me bad influence. With that, I gave her all my accounts: my gmails, my discord, my instagram, heck even my reddit acc (this is a burner acc so I’m fine I hope). But that incident was 5 years ago. I like to think that I changed. Not for good considering that my attitude has been acting up strangely, more like I changed because I choose beneficial friends.
Just recently, she received a notification from a guy I met in college.
“girl you can say that again! I love him sm”
She told me to stop. Stop talking? Idk, she screenshotted the notification to me then said in caps lock “STOP.” I simply told her that we were talking about a music artist that we both like. You see, I like friends who have the same interest as me. Then later I sent a follow up message, “can’t I share my interests with my new friends or should I stick with my old ones” (my friends back in high school when I wasn’t homeschooled). She replied “WHY DO YOU HAVE TO COMMAND LIKE THAT.” I immediately said sorry twice.
I lowk don’t know when I can actually live my life ngl. I felt like I’ve been living with her eyes following me everywhere I go. Am I the asshole for her to act that way? Am I the asshole for simply having a conversation? I mean I could stick with my old friends if she wants to. But doing so would make me feel lonely during my time in college. Haha idk anymore (well thinking about what I did back then, I guess I’m the asshole for even getting myself into Discord for her to lose her trust in me)
It’d be nice to see an actual mom sharing her thoughts about this. Ig it’d be easier for me to understand my mom.