My husband and I are staying with his mom and her husband because we are between places. I’m not the biggest fan of her husband though he has always been decent enough towards us.
The other day I was at the house while my husband was working and MIL was out. MIL’s husband was fighting with his sister, basically she is getting married for the fourth time and he doesn’t want to go because he doesn’t approve. He made a snarky comment about he’ll go to the next one. She said he shouldn’t talk because he’s divorced as well.
He replied a second marriage is normal, a fourth marriage is not. Then he said his first marriage didn’t count because he was just "using Diana (the first wife) because he needed her dad’s money to fund his career" He said "the only person he ever loved was Tessa (MIL)" so really the first divorce was "inevitable" He then laughed and said "paid well though"
I was disgusted. I just got suck an ick and personally I would want to know if I was with that sort of man, so when MIL came home I told her what he said. She kind of gave me a weird look and said she didn’t get what the problem was because he said he loved her. I told her I just thought she should know what sort of man he was, and she said she knew everything and its weird I’d assume he hadn’t told her himself. It was just a weird convo, and she acted like I was overreacting.
Later that day he walked past me and muttered something about me having audacity to live in his house and "spy on him" and try to cause drama. Honestly I was just looking out for her because he clearly isn’t a good man.
YTA
You’re a guest in their home and this is the way you repay them.
If he said it about your mother-in-law I could see you making an argument for talking to your husband about it and possibly telling her. But he didn’t
I wouldn’t blame them if they asked you guys to leave. Other people’s conversations are none of your business.
I think you just told them what kind of person you are.
A meddling busy body who should be more focused on straightening out her own situation
YTA
Not for listening in but for telling your MIL about it. He also may not be a monster he could just be rationalizing and trying to justify it to himself. Regardless, this is old news to her. Don’t get involved in their relationship issues. You can talk about it with your wife but never talk to MIL of FIL about this kind of thing again esp not while you live there.
i didn’t have to read the post to know that yes, YTA. Big time.
way to show gratitude for folks letting you stay at their home.
YTA. This is way overstepping your boundaries. I understand you think you were being a good person or whatever, but messing in your in-law’s marriage about something that apparently happened decades ago? Weird as hell. You were eavesdropping/spying on your father-in-law and running with stories from an overheard argument he had with his own family member. Weird.
The way my mouth dropped when I read that you were living with them! Why would you think to open your mouth and you live with them? That is diabolical lol
Go ahead and see how fast your welcome has been overstayed.
YTA. You are not thinking straight and letting your own emotions control your actions. If you keep doing this, you are going to end up hurting others.
See. Here’s the thing. You can be disgusted. It’s your feeling and no one can say you’re wrong there.
It’s what you did next. You felt it was right to complain to MIL. And what did you expect her to do? Divorce him because he married her for love? Divorce him because he married his ex for money? Fight with him because, he loved her and married her?
Exactly what are you looking for MIL to do? Pat you on the head and feed you a bone and say good girl?
In case you needed another opinion, YTA.
What a wild overstep you just did. Truly zero understanding of boundaries, interpersonal relationships between married people, and an absolute lack of discretion.
YTA. You need to mind your own business.
Just wondering. If you guys don’t have anywhere to live, would it be a good idea for you to look for employment instead of spending your time eavesdropping?
YTA. You’re inserting yourself into someone else’s relationship. I really doubt he hadn’t already said to his wife what you heard him tell his sister.
>My husband and I are staying with his mom and her husband because we are between places.
Better step up that search for your own place. Chances are you just expedited your departure from their home.
>I’m not the biggest fan of her husband though he has always been decent enough towards us.
You sound like an ungrateful pill.
YTA
The way he said that sounded so candid, like it was obvious/known to others.
Your MIL is probably aware of how much he got in the divorce. Do you even know when/how long they were married?
YTA. This is weird behaviour on your part.
If you’ve worn out your welcome, I wouldn’t even be surprised. No way would you be staying in my house and “telling” on me.
What was your endgame here? What was the MIL supposed to do about the fact that he… checks notes… loves her?!
Your husband has every right to be pissed about this. They may want you out. He may even stay while you have to leave. I know I wouldn’t be homeless because you wanted to play morality police.
YTA