So I(F19) told my boyfriend (M18) a embarrassing secret about me many months ago. I’ll say it on here since no one really knows my reddit account, but basically what it is is that even though I’m an adult I still SOMETIMES call my parents "mommy" and "daddy"… Yes I know that’s really childish and idk why I still did it as an adult. I just call them "Mom" and "Dad" now, but I only stopped many months ago. One day I finally confessed to my boyfriend that the reason I don’t wanna call him "Daddy" during sex is cause it makes me think of my dad since I sometimes still called him that. This weirded things out for a while (Not surprised) but then he got over it and didn’t tell anyone else for a while, and I did eventually stop calling my parents that from how embarrassed I felt after I told him.
Months later, (a couple weeks ago) I was hanging out with him, his cousins, my brother, and his sister and one of his cousins asked if I ever call him "Daddy" and he said, "No, but she still calls her dad that!" even when I said how I stopped, that of course didn’t help and they made fun of me for it non-stop. I was so embarrassed and wished I never even told him that. He didn’t care though, and just made fun of me some more, and he would even make jokes about me cheating and abusing him EVEN THOUGH I never did any of those things. He just found it funny.
Fast forward to today, a friend of mine was talking to me about this guy who has the same name as my boyfriend but has a foot fetish. I told my brother about it and he started asking my boyfriend "You have a foot fetish?!" and making foot fetish jokes towards him. My boyfriend got really mad at me since I technically started this by showing my brother what my friend was telling me about the guy, and made it look like he was talking about my boyfriend before actually telling my brother that he wasn’t. At first I thought "Well he did embarrass me first" but now I’m starting to think that maybe I did go a little too far and I might have fucked up my relationship.
AITA?
EDIT: For anyone telling me how I should have talked to him about this first, I just wanna say that I did and he didn’t care. I did tell him many times how I didn’t like the cheating and abusing jokes and he DID say he was gonna stop, but after a while he started them again and told me how I need to learn how to take a joke.
EDIT 2: So he finally texted me back, and said that while he’s still not very happy about it, he forgives me. But I also read the comments, and to everyone saying how revenge isn’t always good and stuff like that, I believe you’re right and if we get into an argument again I won’t ever do something this stupid to him again.
We don’t kink shame, but the guy deserved it. NTA.
ESH.
Obviously.
Him for embarrassing you. You for saying something that made him embarrassed that wasn’t even true.
This isn’t how relationships work. It’s how relationships die.
By the way, not that big of a deal calling your parents ‘mommy’ and ‘daddy.’ He made it a negative so you feel bad about it.
Partners build each other up and find those things sweet. They also keep each other’s vulnerabilities private.
He jokes about you cheating on him and abusing him? Not sure how that would be funny but it’s certainly fucking weird. NTA.
There is a BIG difference between friendly ribbing between significant others, friends and family, and just mocking them. You might want to rethink this relationship if he isn’t going to respect you. btw, it’s not even weird for you to call your parents Mommy and Daddy, it’s not a big deal.
Your update edit: “So he finally texted me back, and said that while he’s still not very happy about it, he forgives me”
and.. he apologized for his own “jokes” and actions, right?
If not, what are you doing to yourself… nearly everyone here is saying YOU need to think about dumping him for his actions.
He sounds childish, insecure and he doesnt seem to respect you
Maybe it’s cultural but I don’t think yes that big of a deal to call your parents mommy/daddy occasionally. I don’t think that would be worth ridicule in a group setting.
That person was out of line for asking if you call your bf daddy tho, like wtf is that about. Also he jokes about you cheating and abusing him? This whole thing sounds like a mess where they dogpiled on you for no reason. Nta
My daughter still calls me Daddy sometimes and she’s 30. NTA, but don’t be so self-conscious about that.
It would be weirder to call him Daddy than your actual Dad. He doesn’t sound right for you.
NTA. The world if f’d up to turn a normal innocent word “Daddy” into a word that’s associated with kink/sex.
Your BF is immature and can’t take it when the joke is on him. Lol
NTA and to be honest, i think its creepy for a man to want to be called daddy during sex. It makes me wonder how young a girl is his perverted ass thinking about and does he often think about sex with his daughter.
Well I guess I’m a 40-year-old who still refers to her parents as mommy and daddy lol. Idc what other think honestly and if they were that miserable I would have removed them from my life ages ago.
NTA. Your boyfriend sucks.
You told him you didn’t want this little secret of yours to be spread. He did it anyway and jokes that you cheat on him and abuse him. And you STILL think this guy is worth keeping?
Good grief, child. Dump his immature keister immediately. There are so many men out there — MEN, not little boys — that have grown beyond this kind of nonsense. Respect yourself and find a good one.
If you didn’t list your ages, I’d swear this is typical elementary school, playground banter.
People in their 30s,40s and 50+ STILL use the terms “mommy” and “daddy” from time to time in regards to their parents. What is there to be embarrassed about?
Same goes for the imaginary foot fetish. Unless your bf is cutting peoples feet off and keeping them in a hidden freezer or, has ambitions to do it.
I can’t believe he thought you calling your father “Daddy” was anywhere near as embarrassing as him wanting his girlfriend/you to call him “Daddy”. NTA