So one of my closest friends left for Europe a month ago and I agreed to look after her dog when gone. It’s a Belgium Malinois and a lot of work to take care of. It needs bite training, walks, specific food I have to prepare and occasionally bites/mouths furniture and other stuff around the house. While on holiday, she has met a guy that she is obsessed in (I am really happy for her truthfully) but she has extended the holiday 2x so far. First for 10 days then another week. At the first extension I was more than happy to look after the dog a little longer as she met the guy near the end of her trip and I wanted to give her the chance to build a connection with him. The second time I told her that "her dog isn’t my responsibility and that it’s becoming a drain having to revolve my life around it" but after she begged me I agreed that one more week is fine.
However, yesterday she said that he was going to pay for them to go on a boat cruise before she leaves extending her trip an additional 5 days. At this point, I said that "I felt I was been taking advantage of, and that if she didn’t come home, that I would take it to a dog keep at her expense". At this point she lost it and said that a "good friend would be happy she was getting an all expense cruise paid for and that she wouldn’t have a problem doing this for me". At this I was pretty shook, I have been taking care of her dog for nearly 6 weeks now, and really am happy for her. IDK am I the Asshole here
NTA obviously. Just tell her that for each extra day that she keeps pushing, you charge x amount as interest rate. But to be honest, this dog deserves a better owner who cares for them and trains them. Malinois are a lot of work as you said!
They are more than a lot of work. They are like a second job. If you don’t exercise them, they just have this excess energy that goes into breaking your house
Your friend seems like a major AH tbh, poor dog!
Yeah this is insane. Tell her a good friend would compensate their friend for extending the dog sitting well past the original agreement. Honestly some people.
NTA, Belgian Malinois are fantastic dogs but in my opinion not suitable as pets unless they also have a job with the owner or at least get to go with the owner everywhere due to the amount of mental and physical stimulation they need to be happy. There are dog hotels that are specifcally for these types of long-term vacations and you’re doing your friend a favour by watching their dog, it is not yours and not your final responsibility. You agreed to the first holiday and the extension, but you didn’t agree to watch HER dog indefinitely until she decides to come home. You have to defend your own space and time, you didn’t take a dog despite obviously liking dogs (since you wouldn’t even be watching one otherwise) because you probably determined for yourself that you don’t or can’t invest the time and energy, having to do that for a dog that in the end you still have to give back with basically no reward is unfair to you.
NTA a “good friend” wouldn’t leave a high needs dog with a friend for longer than the agreed upon time unless theres a real emergency. And if they did would understand that the care can become too much.
NTA. She should be paying you for the services
NTA. You’ve already done way more than most people would. Watching a Belgian Malinois is a lot of work, and doing it for nearly six weeks is a huge favor. You were understanding the first two times she extended her trip, which already shows you were trying to support her and give her time to enjoy meeting someone new.
At some point though, it stops being a favor and starts feeling like you’re being taken advantage of. It’s reasonable to set a boundary when your life has been revolving around someone else’s dog for over a month. Being happy for your friend doesn’t mean you have to keep sacrificing your time indefinitely, and asking her to come back or pay for a kennel is completely fair.
NTA
I don’t care her reason. You are being taken advantage. She extended it more than once from original plan and that is wrong.
She lost it? Screw her. She is not your friend because you are her free dog sitter.
NTA
It’s absolutely bonkers to leave your belgian mal with a friend and keep extending the trip. They are more than a pet. With most dogs you can walk them once, twice a day, do some training, cuddles and call it a day. A mal is a whole lifestyle.
She’s getting a cruise paid for by a man she’s known for less than a month in a foreign country?
That woman is about to be human trafficked. Seriously. This is a pretty typical way they go about it. Dazzle a foreign woman, start dating, the relationship is amazing, and then they disappear forever.
NTA, follow through.
Yes the dog is a problem BUT THIS IS THE REAL ISSUE RIGHT HERE!!
NTA. Either bill her for ALL the extra time and effort she dumped on you, or tell her that she’s risking forfeiting ownership of the dog if she keeps flaking out on you. You are not obliged to hold on to her pet indefinitely and you are, actually, being taken advantage of because you keep letting her manipulate you into saying yes.
Your friend is about to get herself into some serious trouble, and is either about to disappear off the face of the planet or be asked to carry something home in her suitcase and “some guy” he knows will pick the thing up from her when she gets home (or rather she’ll be in a prison cell for drug trafficking).
The dog here is the least of the problems, but yes, get the dog some proper care and chalk your friend up as a fool with the self preservation skills of a game bird that’s seen a big bag of grain and ignored the guys with the shotguns next to it.
NTA