AITA for telling my parents about my sister moving in with a man she barely knows

My sister has been apartment hunting for about a year and mentioned to me that she finally found a roommate and that she was going to move in with them. She was being kind of evasive about the roommate, until she admitted it was Mark, one of her friends she met at the company she started working for last year. She asked that I don’t mention it to our parents, because she thought they would overreact and freak out.

I looked the guy up online and I can see why she thought that they would be upset, because a single woman moving in with a guy makes it look like they’re in a relationship, and Mark isn’t the type of guy my parents would approve of her dating. She says it’s just platonic, but I think she doesn’t really understand how guys think and it could be asking for trouble. I started to get a few red flags and called my dad and let him know what she was planning on doing.

She texted me a long rant about how our parents called her to try and convince her to not move in with him and that I ruined her day with them yelling and that she’s never going to trust me with anything. I tried to tell her that we were just worried about her safety but she said she’s old enough to make her own decisions and now she won’t respond.

AITA?

14 thoughts on “AITA for telling my parents about my sister moving in with a man she barely knows”
  1. YTA. You broke her trust and now you have lost her trust. She is an adult. You and your parents need to learn where your lanes are and stay in them.

  2. YTA. Assuming you are both adults, you can express your concerns to her when she brought it up. Running to your parents like a toddler tattling is super immature behavior. 

    She is correct that it’s her business. 

  3. YTA. She’s an adult. She trusted you with personal info and asked for one thing, don’t tell the parents. You broke that because you felt uncomfortable, not because she was in danger. That’s not protection, that’s control

  4. Huh? What makes you think she is dating this guy? She was looking for a roommate and she found a roommate. Seems totally normal. YTA. 

  5. She’s 30 years old and he is about the same age. They are both adults. You mention “Mark isn’t the type of guy my parents would approve of her dating” but you don’t elaborate, which leaves us guessing as to if they are racist. Or you are. What are the “few red flags” you “started to get”?

    Your sister clearly had a good reason to tell you not to tell them, but you blabbed and now she is rightfully pissed off and doesn’t trust you anymore. Good luck repairing the relationship, because it’s going to take a looonnnngg time.

    YTA

  6. >a single woman moving in with a guy makes it look like they’re in a relationship, and Mark isn’t the type of guy my parents would approve of her dating

    >She says it’s just platonic
    **She’s 30. I’m not sure how old Mark is, but he looks like he’s her age**. I’m 24.

    She is her own person. Meaning: a 30yo adult.

    And if she wants a roommate, probably to offset costs, then that’s her call. She doesn’t need you or your parents judgement on her choices, or her life. Underscore *judgement*, because that’s what this post is about.

    YTA for “telling mom!” and not trusting your sister

  7. YTA. You need roommates to survive in this economy and a good roommate is a rare find, the gender doesn’t matter.

    Unless you saw something in looking him up that makes you think he would rape her because that’s the only reason something would happen without her concent.

    If you’re only worried because he has a penis and you think all men can’t control themselves then you might need to work on yourself.

  8. YTA not only did you break trust between your sister hurting your relationship but it also was likely for nothing. You seem really judgemental of Mark just based on his looks your sister knows him and is an adult making the decision to live with him. Unless she’s proven she makes bad decisions you had no reason to break her trust based on a safety concern. Men and Women can 100% live together as friends and nothing more. As someone who has had many male roomate’s and have never dated or literally had any romantic feelings or actions towards them or them towards me it’s kinda weird you think her living with a man means something sexual will happen. I think you’ve way over steeped and you’ve harmed your relationship with your sister.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *