Making this anonymous because I don’t want anyone i know to see this. So this june im leaving for greece for one and a half month to be with my family for possibly the last time in 4 years as when you turn 18 you have to go to the military in greece so ill have to stay in the US for the 3-4 years after i turn 18 before i can go see my family again, as Ill be a US citizen by then and not have to go. My girlfriend of 1.5 years thinks this is ridiculous and irrational and called my family obsessive and needy even thought my grandma could very well pass away in those 4 years when im not there so i want to get enough time to be with them and enjoy them while they’re still here . I called her selfish for this but she proceeded to call me an asshole and and idiot and say that i never think rationally and put emotion over common sense but i really think she’s the one putting emotion over common sense here because she should understand my situation. I want to spend my summer with her of course this isn’t anything personal to her but I also really want to be with my family before I can’t anymore
NTA. She is a selfish child. Enjoy your time in Greece to the fullest!
You’re clearly NTA… You guys are young and she is probably just scared to see you leave for so long.
Curious (mostly because G-Ma) can you not just surrender your Greek Citizenship once you get US citizenship and then travel back freely?
If the answer is solely “I don’t want to renunciate.” I get that. I don’t think I would be willing to do that in your shoes either. Also your NTA no matter what the answer is here.
yes you can and that’s what I plan to do but i can only do that once i get my citizenship which is 4 years away still
Ohhh… That makes sense. Sorry I was assuming the “4 year” window was a required conscription age of 18-22 or something.
Yeah you aren’t the asshole. But be nice to your GF about it (not saying you have to tolerate it, just be nice about it). You guys are kids and she is probably just scared she is gonna lose to such a “long” trip and she probably has no real exposure to how serious service dodging can be in Countries outside of the US.
It’s your life. Do whatever you want. Go see your family.
Your girlfriend will either be okay or she will become your ex girlfriend. Doesn’t matter.
NTA
You’re justifying this trip based on things to do with citizenship, military service, and aging family members in ill health. Which is all reasonable, but the main point is that even if you strip all that stuff away, it is still totally normal for an 18-year-old to take an extended summer trip to see family in his country of origin or ancestral home. NTA – tell your GF to give you a “rational” explanation why you *shouldn’t* do this.
NTA is there any reason she doesn’t want you to go other than that she’ll miss you? Will being gone that long put your job in jeopardy? Do you live together and she’ll be on the hook for 100% of the rent and utilities and groceries while you’re gone and worries she can’t afford it?
If she just doesn’t want to go 6 weeks without seeing you, then she’s the one being emotional and sentimental instead of rational, she could even potentially visit for a few days. You have a very straightforward plan, I hope it all works out!
none of those other than she won’t get to spend summer with me. that’s why i thought she was the one being irrational but words get to you so i wanted to ask people here to see if im the asshole here
NTA. Your gf is being possessive and ridiculous and immature and selfish. It’s 6 weeks, not 6 years, and you will resent her forever if something bad happens in those 4 years. Honestly, you should cut your losses with her now, she’s only going to get worse.