This is my first post so im sorry if I mess anything up.
So this was during my cousin sisters wedding, during the Sangeet (a small function during the wedding where people dance to music as a celebration for the bride) i had prepared a song since I absolutely suck at dancing. To be honest I did not want to perform all together but if you were in the close family of the bride its pretty much unacceptable if you dont perform and hence I kinda had to do it. On the day of the Sangeet I waited till most people left so I could be a little less uncomfortable, by the time I sang there were only a few people left, just my cousins and 3 of my aunts. After I performed I couldn’t stop crying since the song was emotional and I realised how much id miss my cousin.
I sat down while others sang too, not a performance just having fun. My mom who was sitting next to me told me that I should sing the other song I had prepared. I had prepared two songs, one of which I really didn’t like since the key was a little to low for me and I just didnt like it and days before the wedding I had told my mother I didn’t like it at all and won’t be performing it. So when my mother asked me to go sing the other song I said no, however she insisted and asked me 2 or 3 more times to do it, I was crying and the song my mother wanted me to sing was more of a happy song, plus I hate singing in front of people and only did it before cause I had to. I told my mom no and asked her to stop insisting, but she was adamant and yelled out loud to my cousins on stage to call me up to perform the other song, I was super high on emotions and got mad at my mom for disrespecting my choices, I said no again to everyone in a nice tone but my sibling started hooting and calling me on stage and my mom just continued pushing me. I got up and not super loudly but loud enough for most ppl to hear said "I cant believe you, you dont respect me mom i hate you", I admit that I should have not said this loudly but I was super angry at this point, my mom didnt say anything and just smiled. I went up and sang another song.
Later my mom refused to talk to me and my real sister thinks Im in the wrong. But I feel as though I was pushed to do something I really didnt want to, but I do feel bad that I yelled at my mom and I then apologise just to end the tension.
So aita?
YTA
Shouldn’t have added the I hate you part. You should apologize to her and try to make it up to her. I’m assuming you’re from India. It’s so much worse that you said it in front of your paternal family.
ESH. You shouldn’t have said you hated your mom in front of everyone. Emotions are not an excuse for verbal abuse.
But your mom is also an AH for pressuring you after you said no several times. And then she got others to pressure you anyway. Like what was the point of her asking if she was just going to try and force you to do something anyway?
NTA. Why did you not get up and walk out of the room after you said no? Other people were leaving so that would have been no insult to the bride.
Everyone who left was more from the distant family but the bride and I are super close so it definitely would have been an insult to the bride
First of all, I’m sorry about the family relationships here. Isnt your cousin’s sister also your cousin?
But NTA, noone can force you to do anything you don’t want to do.
Are you here because you want people to tell you that you were justified to tell your mother you hate her for pressuring you to sing? You need to do some growing up. YTA.