For context, i am a 22, almost 23F who lives with my mom and younger (19F) sister. I’ve been paying rent and helping with other bills at home since i started working at 17, and to this day my sister does not pay or contribute towards a single bill (she works, but because she hasn’t been asked to) My mom does work, but she has student loan debt and honestly manages her money poorly. I’m at the point where i want to move out, I make a great living, I’m in a relationship and i want to continue with my adult life, but the responsibility of signing another lease with my mom holds me back from leaving. I don’t feel that it’s fair anymore that my mom gets to continue to depend on me for rent money and to pay other bills while my sister bares no responsibility at all. Am i the asshole?
NTA
You need to talk to your landlord, tell them you are moving out and ask to be removed from the lease of you are formally on it.
Sister needs to be ADDED to the lease as an adult occupant.
If mom cannot handle the cost of the rent, then sister needs to pay up or mom needs to get a job.
You are NOT responsible to care for your mom at your age. This is all on her. Your possible cultural expectations need to be set aside and you need to live your own life.
NTA. At your age you don’t need anyone’s permission to move out and sever your financial ties. Why should you sign a lease with your mother? Let your sister do that. It’s not fair, but you have to be the one to change the dynamic. Go for it
NTA. Do not sign a lease(or contract) for anyone else in your life, period. Your credit life starts as soon as you hit 18 years of age.
Tell Mom you’re moving out at the end of the lease, inform your landlord, IN WRITING, that you’re moving out and won’t be signing for your mom & sister.
Good luck!
NAH but you need to acknowledge your role in all this. “She hasn’t been asked to” = you have not asked her. “My mom gets to continue to depend on me” = you continue to let your mother depend on you. “The responsibility of signing another lease with my mom” = your agreeing to sign another lease. (What makes it your responsibility to do that?)
It’s time to fly out of the nest. Their financial problems are not your responsibility. I have 3 grown children. I have never once expected financial support from them.