**AITA for thinking constant car honking as a “greeting” is annoying and not wanting to join in?**
My wife and I are expats living in the Netherlands, and we’ve been here for a few years now. Overall, we like it here and try to integrate as well as we can.
Over the past two or three years, we’ve noticed a behavior in our neighborhood that genuinely confuses me. Almost every day, cars entering or leaving our street (and nearby streets) honk their horns as a kind of “hello” or “goodbye.” This happens especially in summer, but also year-round, sometimes multiple times a day (for example, four times in just the past few hours).
My wife thinks this might be a local custom and believes we should do the same to be more friendly, integrate better, and help improve the neighborhood atmosphere. I, on the other hand, find it disruptive and kind of unnecessary, and I worry that joining in would just add more noise and make things worse.
I’m not trying to be disrespectful or judgmental, but I genuinely can’t tell if this is an accepted social norm here or something people just tolerate. I don’t want to come across as rude by *not* participating, but I also don’t want to contribute to something that might annoy others.
So, AITA for thinking this behavior is annoying and not wanting to honk whenever I arrived home to let everyone know I’m there?
And no, this is not troll bait, they genuinely drive my wife crazy, while I just sort of assume they are local rednecks and ignore it.
NAH- my family is Dutch and I’ve never heard of this, so it might be a very regional thing? Nevertheless, it’s clearly a custom of your neighborhood that people seem to enjoy participating in. Are you an asshole for not participating? No, it’s not that deep. Is your wife the asshole for wanting to participate? No, wanting to join in on customs of the place you live in is normal. Are your neighbors assholes for doing this? In another region of the world, probably, but in a neighborhood where it’s a cultural norm that people actively participate in of their own will? No, it’s just another custom you’ll have to get used to like people sending a tikkie for 0.3€
Dutch person here – this is not a custom, people do this sometimes if someone were to wave them goodbye but not always at all, and so much you hear it multiple times a day? ive lived here all my life and go most days without hearing random honking like that
only thing i can think of is maybe you live on a street that has a rather confusing / slightly dangerous and prone to accidents corner or something? people could be warning others they’re about to come round the corner, like they do in mountainous areas where there’s a tight road before a corner
it is not usual at all though
Imo, you should ask on some Netherland focused sub. Cause only people living there can answer