My son (6) s/o (40m) and me (41f) were at a diner tonight. there was an older couple who were seated behind us in a booth for the first 20 minutes we were there. When the server came and took our order we talked to him about my son having aspiration pneumonia because he wasn’t hungry but the doctor had just told him he needed food. I clearly and loudly stated that it was not contagious kind of pneumonia to ease the server or whoever was about to hear my son when he had a coughing fit. After we ordered my son coughed for a good minute or so. 30 seconds later the older lady gets up and finds the closest employee, (a bus boy) I hear her say they don’t want to sit next to us and then she looked at me and saw I was paying attention and her voice got lower so I didn’t hear why but the last thing she said was if not they will leave and they were "regular" customers so they should be accommodated. Then the busser gets the server who moves them. now for context, I’m an older mother at 41, I have bright pink hair and I wear tye dye. I am always told I’m an amazing mother (I know I can do better) and that my son is a perfect angel, (he is the best kid ever) 6 years old and kind, quiet and smart. he holds doors open for strangers, says excuse me and yes ma’am and thank you. he even compliments people about something he likes about them if they smile back when he smiles at them. perfect angel despite having a potty mouthed, autistic, borderline personality disorder mother who frequently pops off at the mouth unexpectedly. His father, (s/o) is a saint himself, I tell him he’s like Jesus because he’s a carpenter and truly the best person ever. Very vanilla and just plain nice. I’m not nice. So idgaf whether I’m the asshat or not. I’ll take it and and die on that hill. it was to me, white privilege at its finest. The lady got what she wanted. American society has let these people do whatever the fuck they want and it pisses me off.
Now at home, decompressing with my s/o he doesn’t think I should have been offended at all or even cared why they moved, because it didn’t change our service or food.
I didn’t actively say anything to the lady seeing as I’m a bigger person but I would love to know their reason for not wanting to sit by us anymore. my s/o says they probably moved for another reason.
Why are you pissed off that she moved? Because you said loudly that it wasn’t contagious? She doesn’t know you. She doesn’t know if you know that for sure, and she might not have even heard you. Maybe she did not want to hear your child coughing during dinner?
Yes. You should let it go. No one wants to sit next to a coughing kid. They didn’t say anything to you, you didn’t say anything to them. Your poor husband is just trying to live his life. Grow up and control your subconscious.
Not going to say Y T A, but kinda you are. Did they know your race or hair color before standing up?
You don’t know what someone’s physical or mental health background is. “White privilege at it’s finest” feels like an overreaction, without knowing other factors. As a brown person with some health issues, I would probably do the same if it happened while in a low immunity period.
A lot of people say they’re not contagious when they are. It doesn’t mean you did, but it’s reasonable to not be around coughing. Are you offended Because it felt like an offense to your kid?
If I were the old couple, I wouldn’t have gotten up and moved. I would have got up and left.
I wouldn’t be able to enjoy my meal with someone having coughing fits.
Look, I get your point. Your doctor says he’s not contagious, and that’s good enough *for you*. But it’s not like this lady could verify that. And even if you were carrying a written declaration of noncontagiousness, I think I’d still side with her right to ask for a reasonable accommodation — especially since that accommodation did not affect you at all (aside from wounding your pride).
I would have moved too. This has nothing to do with white privilege. Your kid was coughing. They’re elderly and don’t want to get sick and die. They don’t know whether or not you’re correct about it not being contagious. Even so, I don’t want anyone coughing in the vicinity of my food.
YTA for taking a sick child to a restaurant.
Move on please this isn’t even worth a post.
YTA. I would move too. You should’ve gotten the food to go and eat at home.
Yeah I wouldn’t trust you either. I really don’t go out much because I really don’t trust people, but I have 2 different kinds of cancer and a compromised immune system. I would move too.
I think the most obvious reason is that listening to someone having a coughing fit that lasted a minute or more would not be very pleasant while trying to enjoy a meal. They may not have been paying the slightest attention to/heard your statement to the server that the poor little guy is not contagious, especially since they were old people. I don’t know those old people, but I am old and I could not care less what race people sitting near me are, or if they have pink hair, but I don’t want to hear coughing fits when I’m trying to eat. I will trust your judgment as to whether or not your sick little boy was well enough to be taken out while coughing that hard, but I must say I don’t think you’re being reasonable making a judgement that the old couple were racist assholes when there is a much more obvious explanation for them wanting to move. So gentle YTA, and I hope your son is feeling much better very soon.
Taking someone who is having coughing episodes, or any other very obvious health issues, to eat in a restaurant is not a good idea.
Why not just feed him at home or get some take out to have at home? No one, post-COVID, wants to expose themselves to potential contagion, and some older people are more at risk.
YTA for not just feeding your audibly sick child at home.
YTA. Nobody, regardless of age or race, wants to eat around someone coughing. You should have fed your child at home
YTA for so many reasons. I’m sure your child is as amazing as you claim, but I don’t have to be in the room with you. Announcing he isn’t contagious doesn’t mean anything. An older couple asked to be moved without approaching you, and it didn’t affect you at all. Your hair color, skin color, and age really have nothing to do with this.
YTA. People lie about their kids being sick all the time so that they can do what they want or not miss out. All that woman wanted to do was move *herself* away from a kid that sounds so awful that his parents *warned everyone around them*. Didn’t inconvenience you at all.
You’re literally raging because people didn’t want to listen to your kid hack up a lung while they’re trying to eat. Maybe you’re so upset about it because you feel judged but you *know* your kid was an issue here and it’s your own fault this happened.