Yesterday I got removed from the local community WhatsApp group chat… it was only 48 hours old, and I was there from the start.
The group was supposed to be a criminal alert system because we’ve got major crime going on with dirtbike riders in balaclavas robbing the community at knifepoint in broad daylight.
The group started to go off topic really quickly.
Someone suggested starting a side group chat.
The admin said “I can not offer a general group chat here at this time as it is too much to manage within one group.”
So I stupidly created one without his permission.
I added him as a member only out of respect, but I do see now that I should have asked his permission first.
Other members had to “like” my comment IF they wanted to be added.
THE ADMIN REMOVED ME IMMEDIATELY without warning or explanation. Even after I sent him an apology, he did not respond.
JUST NOW he made an “announcement” (which I can still see as I’m only removed from the group I guess).
The announcement says “If you or anyone of your family members are identified to be involved in any type of criminal activity you will be removed and blocked without explaination.”
Out of the 80 members I’m the ONLY ONE that has been removed!!!
It also says “You are welcome to private message me to arrange a meeting ‘face to face’ to discuss it.” but I honestly don’t want to meet him after being humiliated just for trying to help.
I am beyond embarrassed, especially even more so now that this announcement has been made.
Am I really the asshole just for creating another WhatsApp group chat?
I only added approximately four people before I was removed and there wasn’t any conversations happening whatsoever.
This feels so bad.
I am a mother of 11… not a criminal… but now 79 community members who can see that I’ve been removed from the group, who now see that announcement are left to question my character.
I feel so sick to my stomach.
I wish they knew that my eldest two couldn’t be a part of the crime not just because of their upbringing but because they are severely disabled… my second eldest is still in diapers… he can’t even speak let alone organise crime.
What on earth
This was my reaction too, just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse, it did.
I’m confused as to why you’ve reposted this? You have good responses on your original post
Edit: I see this is technically an update adding that they want to meet face to face to “prove” you aren’t a criminal
The earlier post was just one element (me creating a group chat without permission), just now a group announcement was pinned (which I can still see) stating “If you or anyone of your family members are identified to be involved in any type of criminal activity you will be removed and blocked without explaination.”
I’m the only one that has been removed from that group chat which looks unbelievably bad when you consider the closeness of that announcement and the time I was removed
I have absolutely no idea what to do, I mean I never even wanted to be readded, I just wanted clarification as to why I was removed without warning
And now to be basically cleared of being a criminal I am supposed to meet him face to face… it just doesn’t make any sense. What I did doesn’t fit this punishment
In my opinion, don’t do it. You don’t have to prove yourself. I think it’s common decency to at least give a reason for being blocked/banned/removed.
It doesn’t really make sense for them not to inform you if one of your children have been identified as being involved in criminality either tbh, how are you supposed to do something about it if they don’t tell you. Their “block with no explanation” mentality is weird because how does that stop the crimes they claim to have made the group for. I guess the face to face meet-up makes sense then but it’s a little risky. If you do go, don’t go alone
My gut also says don’t go because it feels really weird, I mean the admin already had extended discussions with us prior to adding each member. I was torn because I was worried about what the whole group would be thinking of my family and I.
The other concern for him I guess would be that the other night after basketball I was with 10 of my kids walking home and the balaclava boy rode past us but didn’t harass us even though he harasses everyone… he might be thinking that that boy was my son (but my son wasn’t with us because even though he’s the same size as the dirtbike rider, my son needs to be pushed in an adult pram and I just couldn’t do it that night so I left him to spend time with his dad)
Thank you for helping me try and work my mind through this 🙏🏽 I mean I was worried before but this new announcement has really pushed me so far down
If you are worried, you could try private message him like it says you can, say you don’t feel safe meeting face to face. Apologise for the second group situation and leave it at that. If he doesn’t reply then it’s on him at that point, you have nothing to prove
I already private messaged him yesterday apologising for what I had done and letting him know that I am happy to delete the group I had created. I never asked him if I could be added to his group again (because from that very moment it felt wrong) and he read it but never bothered to give me his time (even 24+ hours later) to just part ways decently. Even if he just said “thanks for apologising” or “yeah delete your group of two people” or just something anything I wouldn’t have felt as much of a failure as what I do right now. Honestly thank you for helping me to stop crying!!!