so I’ve recently joined a new friend group in college and the one who introduced me to them was my friend (m) (we will call him leo for the sake of the story). so leo introduced me to the friend group after he got into a relationship with his now gf who ended up being my friend also. after they got together it was obvious she was extremely jealous about him so to avoid any problems i cut contact with him and restricted it to talking to him only when she’s there (even tho he was my friend first). recently i texted the gc that i was traveling and I’ll miss them then leo texted me privately joking about me traveling suddenly i sent him a brief text joking back and he wished me a safe trip and that was all. since i travelled his gf (now my semi bsf) wouldn’t text me and told me she has had a bad day and couldn’t talk when i tried texting her. an gour ago i talked to her again and she told me that she felt betrayed by me aka her closest friend and that she couldn’t believe she trusted such fake people. i told her to slow down and tell me what happened and she told me "why didn’t you tell me that you joked with leo over text" i was stunned tbh but i told her that i genuinely forgot it happened cuz i was at the airport and had a million other things to do. she dismissed me and now she wouldn’t respond to me.
So aith for responding to him ?
and what could i have done other than that.
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Or, better question… does Leo fancy OP? Because that’s the only thing I can think would make gf upset over this. Provided OP is telling the whole story.
no i don’t. actually he reminds me of my little brother a bit
NTA
>”why didn’t you tell me that you joked with leo over text”
This is one of the dumbest things I’ve heard
So you have to clear all your correspondence with her first?
NTA
NTA. But she most definitely is.
NTA
There is nothing wrong with communicating with someone you were friends with prior to their relationship starting, especially if there is nothing inappropriate in the conversation. BUT, you did allow this dynamic to form by pulling back from your initial friendship and not challenging this or having a discussion with her. If you want your relationship with either to continue you will need to discuss boundaries with her on what you are and are not willing to do in regards to your preexisting friendship with her bf and then hope she can get over her insecurities enough to have a balanced friendship. If you can’t do that, or she can’t, this friendship is doomed.
NTA. People like this girl are impossible to be friends with because it’s constant nonsense. How does she know it happened? Almost certainly bc she went to Leo’s phone. If she did that, she saw it was a 3 text exchange, that HE started, with completely innocent content. But she’s mad at you. It’s completely absurd. And it’s borderline abusive to Leo that he seemingly isn’t allowed to have friendships or independent communication. She needs therapy.
believe it or not this is not the first time and i communicated to him multiple times that she is cutting him off from everyone and that is not healthy and his response is that he doesn’t want that and he will give her an ultimatum but everytime i find out he did nothing so idk what to do
Yeah I’d stop being friends with her. This level of pretty jealousy doesn’t get better
NTA something that jealous and insecure was bound to have tjis sort of reaction no matter what happened I just hope her boyfriend is smart enough to see it and end things eith her and so are you snd everyone else because this kind of person is exhausting to be around.
you need to let leo know she’s this jealous and psycho.
Find another bff