Context: My uncle is divorced as of last year, he used to be really mean to everyone but now he’s better, but he is still rude to people like my SIL for inviting his ex wife to her wedding because she meet her before the divorce.
Me and my fiance have been together for almost a year. So after about 7 months of dating, my fiance proposed to me, at this point I thought my uncle would respect the fact that my fiance need’s to at least be called my fiance when asking me where he was…boy was I wrong. For the next 5 months, he called my fiance ‘your friend’.
Side note, I know this should not bother me, but all my other aunts and uncles call him my fiance because that’s what he is or they say his actual name. My grandma and grandpa also call him by his name when asking where he is if he isn’t at a family gathering.
Now for the point where I started to get pissed. For some reason at one of my family gatherings my fiance wasn’t at, my uncle asked me about five times "where’s your friend?" because he would not listen to me say he didn’t feel good. After that one, we had our Christmas gathering, which was after Christmas, and my younger brother had work so he didn’t go to that one, so me and my mom told my aunts and uncles what he all got for chirstmas. I also tried to tell my uncle about five different times that I got my younger brother a stranger things Funko pop (For those wondering, its the target dog dressed up as Eddie) after repeating what I gave him about five times, he then yelled at me for talking over my mom while she was saying what I got my brother even though I was the only one between me and her that was talking. Then, the next family gathering (my fiance was at this one) my uncle decided to kick me. I processed to say, "(uncles name) please stop kicking me." but he kept on kicking me, so I said it again but louder…he did not listen to that either, so I then grabbed his foot and shoved it away while saying, "(Uncle’s name) I just asked you twice to stop kicking me, why aren’t you listening to me? DO NOT KICK ME I DO NOT LIKE IT AND IT’S NOT OK TO KICK YOUR NEICE!" I then got off the floor and went and sat by one of my cousins since I didn’t want to be kicked again.
Then at the last family gathering I just had, my uncle decided to change what he was gonna call my fiance. But unfortunately it was not fiance. As he walked in, he sat down and didn’t see my fiance there, so he looked at me and said, "Hey (my name) where’s your boyfriend?" (Now, before I say this, I 100% know this could be considered overreacting.) I then proceeded to look at my uncle and say, "My FIANCE is at his house because he doesn’t feel good, also he is NOT my boyfriend, he is my FIANCE!" to which he said, "Eh…same thing" I then had to explain what a boyfriend was and what a fiance was.
So AITAH for yelling at my uncle for being a jerk to me and my Fiance?
NTA, he was honestly being super inconsiderate
Why do you care what this asshat thinks? He sounds like he’s not all there. Polite indifference and avoidance is your move here. Why do you have to explain your brothers gift? Why do you have to correct him about your finance? He doesn’t need to understand, it has no bearing on your relationship with your partner. He’s either an idiot or enjoys getting under your skin. Don’t hand the reins to your emotions to someone so horrible.
NTA.
ESH – you’re playing into his trolling. He is being an asshole, and getting a rise out of you, and you keep playing his stupid game. If he doesn’t address your fiancé by name, or as your Fiancé, just ignore him. The rules for family and social gatherings are the same as for internet forums. “DON’T FEED THE TROLLS”
Was removing yourself from the situation not an option?
Kicking to the point you end up on the floor is assault, for that you call the police, let them deal with it.
If your uncle is at a family gathering, you don’t go there anymore. Family can choose which one of you to invite.
Nope, NTA, your Uncle is being a childish tw*t!
Why let irelevant people dim your happines/ relationship?
I work in mortgage, and very often I see refinances because the borrower is getting a divorce and they were awarded the house. We’ll have some interaction with both parties during this process, and believe me, we can tell who left whom.
In this situation, I’m pretty confident it was the unknown aunt who initiated the divorce.
You don’t have to tell him this because that’s kind of a nuclear strike that most people aren’t prepared to deal with, but just know that everyone knows your uncle was the problem in his divorce. Everyone but him.
I mean, legally and for tax purposes, they ask if you’re single or married. Boyfriends and fiancés don’t actually count.
You was purposefully being acting up, and you were more pressed than a panini and had an emotional outburst.
Why do you let him get to you like that??
ESH