I am a 43/m and I matched with a coworker, from another department, at work. Over the last 2 weeks we have texted back and forth almost everyday, including some all night exchanges. She shot down my first date idea but hasn’t stopped the conversation. She is a single mother and busy… but as someone who NEVER puts himself out there like this. I need some help from people with more experience. Do you think I have shot or is she just being friendly because we work in the same building?
Edit: was hard for me to come looking for advice. 10 minutes worth of replies and you guys put me back in a good place being single. I Appreciate every single one of you.
Shooting down the date is a really bad sign. Not sure why she is texting you if she doesn’t want a date. What are the messages about?
Keeping him as her Plan Z backup
She is not being friendly because you work in the same building.
It also seems that she is not interested in going on a date.
When you ask someone out there are three possible responses. “Yes”, “no but let’s do this other thing instead”, and ANY other response. If it’s not one of the first two, it is a “no”
So it seems that she likes being your friend and texting but does not want to date you. Not what you were hoping for, but not a bad situation.
She said no, listen to her. No is no. If you continue interacting with her you tell her she can have that level of you without a date. If you’re not looking for a friend it’s time to make that clear — or since this is a work situation, quietly move on.
Yea balls in her court now.
If she doesn’t want to date you, there’s a chance she’s dating someone else, maybe even casually.. you may be the on-deck batter my friend. ++man
Two strike and your out.
Single mother and busy is a bad excuse.
Texting doesn’t show interest, dates do
Single mother is not an excuse at all. The simple truth is if she wanted to she would. Girls who want to see me organize their end, they get sitters, they find Ubers, they show up. Shes just not interested.
Have you considered just asking her? Asking her if shes interested in actually dating you since she rejected your first date idea? You can word it respectfully, but make it clear you just dont want to waste your time or heart.
You shot your shot, and she said no. Keep it professional.
No means no.
I would have said absolutely not. But you are a grown man. If you like pain, I am on your side still. If she gets back and agrees, call me for some seasoning so you can douse yourself in it befire you enter the lions den.
Okay, so she’s busy and has a child and is chatting with you constantly. You mention TEXT not calls, is this the case?
And on where did you both match, what platform?
Where you deliberately looking for her or she just popped up. If it’s a dating app, she is not interested as she would have got up to go for the date. Afterall you matched, which means she’s making herself available.
Hinge app. I swiped. We been texting for 2 weeks. So went for the 70yard field goal and came up short! Thanks for being real!
If she liked you she’d go out to KFC and a movie with you. Anything to get to know you.
You’re just keeping her occupied while she’s bored bc the guy she really wants isn’t giving her a chance.