I (29y Female) and my husband (30yo Male) got a place a year ago. My SIL (27) needed a spot to live with her son (6) and husband (29) while they got on their feet and we figured we could use the help with rent so we allowed them to sign the lease with us and pay minimal rent with the intent they would eventually find their own place.
SIL has not been very easy to live with and it has caused me to deal with a lot of mental health issues including depression and anxiety.
A few months ago, she found out she was pregnant and this has resulted in everything being about her pregnancy and making it an inconvenience to everyone in ways of controlling house temperature, removing my furniture and replacing it with her own, locking up our animals in our bedroom, removing decorations, going into my bedroom while i am away, demanding I replace (my own) furniture, controlling household cleaners, and demanding certain tasks to be done within moments of me getting home.
It seems like every day there is a problem for me to fix, She does not work while she watches my husband and I work multiple jobs between the two of us. Conversations have been had, nothing has changed. I am exhausted working so much and trying to bend to every demand. I feel taken advantage of.
The lease ends in a couple weeks, and they have not found a new place to live. Despite making an agreement they would move out (brought up in multiple conversations) I fear they will try to stay. I can’t do this for another year, I recently got into therapy to manage this until it’s over.
WIBTA if i enforced the agreement and signed a new lease without them even if that means they have to scramble to find new living accommodations.
TL;DR: My SIL controls my life and I want to enforce the lease agreement.
NTA kick them out
NTA – find somewhere new without them. Not your responsibility, not your problem.
NTA at all, they were given an opportunity to save up, if they didn’t, they’ll have to find another relative to bother.
NTA. You have been more than patient and the lease ending gives you the right to reclaim your space. Your mental health and well being come first. Enforcing the agreement is reasonable.
NTA, leave! Does your husband feel the same way?
Oh he absolutely does. Legally we cant kick them out, but he has also had conversations with them. We are now in a spot we can afford this house that we love more comfortably without them. We are excited to have out home to ourselves
You may need to find a new place and move out. Actually physically getting these people to move out and you stay where you currently are would be a lot harder. New place new start.
I think this is the solution. Op, you can’t stay in your current house. They will turn into squatters and it will be a complete nightmare for you. Buy/get a new house and let the current landlord deal with the squatters.
Why are you even asking? You 2 kept to the 1-yr agreement. Now it’s over. If they’re doing nothing and moving day arrives, just move.
Are they truly just sitting on their hands and implying that they know you and bf will continue fix their housing problems, even after the pita she has been?? They know what they are doing. Just be dispassionate during your move. Act like you’re holding them to their word, say nothing else. Reality has to hit them sometime. Where is her husband in all of this? Sounds like she likes to play at control and he lets her.
He doesn’t even bother to fight with her over it, he knows it will put him in hot water. I feel bad because she’s pregnant but we love our house and they cant afford this house on their own. We don’t want to give up the home we worked so hard for.
NTA, however, I don’t understand why you do what she wants? If she moves furniture, have her husband put it back, if she asks something, have her husband do it. Above all, kick them out. She’s pregnant, so what, they should have thought about that and planned accordingly. They are not teenagers that don’t understand what happens when no protection is used. Also, hormones do make women a bit iffy during pregnancy, however, I doubt anyone becomes an interior designer and a tirant because of it.
Where’s your husband in all of this?
NTA. You’ve spoken about it and if you and your husband are on the same page, he’ll handle it and make sure it’s enforced as this is his sister and he’ll have a better angle to get at this issue. I think you’d be better off signing the lease with a different tenant ASAP to ensure they have to move out without any further excuses, especially since you’ve already mentioned to them many times that the lease is up and they agreed to move out.
Grow a back bone why would you do what she wants?. Kick her out if she’s grown enough to get pregnant again she’s grown enough to find a damn house.
NTA. You need to put your health first. They‘re not your responsibility. They’re taking advantage of your kindness. Where is her husband in all of this? Having another child isn’t helping them get back on their feet.
If you stay with only you and your husband on the lease, there’s no guarantee they’ll move out which could leave you in violation of the lease. Although it’s very inconvenient, you might want to move.