I, 19M, have been engaged for about a month now; wedding planning is on the way. My fiancé 20F and I have been doing the typical things. When thinking through who the wedding party is going to be, we have at least 4 people locked in for both bridesmaids and groomsmen (4 & 4). It will be a decent-sized wedding (200-250). Right now, for bridesmaids it is just both of our two sisters. We are now considering a 5th person on each side. Her next closest friend, let’s call her Kelly is who this post is all about. My fiancé and Kelly are not extremely close but close enough for me to think about her when choosing. They text a bit but don’t hang out that much and my fiancé says that she could certainly see them not being friends in a few years if we move away.
For full honesty I have never really liked this Kelly to start with. I think she is annoying and not driven. But the main issue is that she is overweight. I can’t stop thinking about looking at our wedding pictures in a few years and wishing that this person wasn’t in them. I honestly really don’t think I would enjoy watching Kelly walk down the aisle right before my future wife. She is also the only heavy person in the wedding party if we invite her to be in it.
to be clear, Kelly is not a bad person at all; I just find her annoying and uninteresting.
I enjoy working out and compete in triathlons; my fiancé also does workouts regularly and is a great runner. All this to say I care about my physical appearance.
I am trying to discern if it is more of me not liking Kelly or her being overweight for the pictures. I don’t want to use her weight as a cop-out instead of just being her.
My fiancé isn’t dead set on having Kelly in it and says she really could go either way and would be PERFECTLY fine with just having the 4 and leaving Kelly out.
So how do we decide, and should I tell my fiancé what I think about Kelly?
Oh boy
You’re 19 why are you even engaged
YTA if it’s just because she’s fat. Sounds like you don’t like her, but damn why do you hate fate people so much lol like you can’t even stand to look at them?
You have another reason you just find her uninteresting and your vibes don’t match. Just use that
19 is too immature to be getting married, as you just proved.
You’re a kid with a kid brain. You’re not ready for any of this.
YTA and a superficial bigot who is way too concerned about image over relationships.
YTA. Kelly is your wife’s friend and you want to exclude just because you are vain. I hope you do tell your fiancée how you feel so she can see just how shallow you are and not waste her youth on someone who can’t bear to even look upon bodies he doesn’t find appealing
YTA.
Grow the fuck up.
Imagine being so stuck up that you think a fat person would ruin your wedding photos. You are using her weight as a cop out. YTA
Congratulations on your upcoming divorce!
I don’t understand what the conflict is. If your girl is PERFECTLY fine with leaving Kelly out, then leave her out. In fact, don’t even invite her to the wedding, for her sake. She’s better off without you guys in her life fr
YTA and very immature. I think this post proves you aren’t mature enough to even marry tbh.
You’re not ready for marriage. You have lots of maturing to do.
You do you, she can have Kelly as a bridesmaid at her next wedding in a few years.