I’m using a throwaway account incase someday my parents find my post.
I(17F) have lived with my dad (M33) and step mom (F35) since 2014. I got my first phone in grade 4 due to my dad wanting close contact with me after switching schools and i’d be walking. Every phone I had that he gave me was never locked down with restrictions. My step mom on the other hand? She bought me a phone in grade 7 and locked it down completely. Only 2 hours a day, they had to approve everything, as a child yes I was upset but I think it was more appropriate around that age. I just turned 17 on the 30th and am planning for university in the fall of 2026. I still have the screentime. Barely any time on my phone a day, cant sleep with my phone(even on the weekends), they take it from me, restrict who I talk to(It even came to a point one time where I was only allowed to contact my dads side of the family when my downtime came on so I couldn’t even speak to my own mother). In April I bought my own phone, brand new, used MY OWN money and it’s still being controlled and after buying it they restricted it more, it almost feels like a control tactic, and my parents are quite known for being very controlling in everything in my life. So i’m wondering WIBTA if I finally put my foot down and told them to remove the screentime? I feel like at almost 18 years old it’s insane to have it.
Throwing a fit is not the way to get what you want. Present a mature and well-reasoned argument and suggest reasonable compromises and you’re way more likely to get what you want.
Whilst I agree throwing a fit isn’t the way to go, even if op did present a well reasoned argument, if the parents are this controlling then it’s likely their way or the highway.
Throwing a fit will not make them think you are mature enough for more screen time
Her dad isn’t mature enough to parent a 17 year old. Guy is 33.
Tbh I think a 33 year old dad knows a lot more about why a teenager should not have unlimited screentime than a 50 year old dad would
Have you spoken to your mother about this? Does she have any custody of you? I really feel like unless there is a legitimate reason, they shouldn’t be preventing you from speaking with your mother.
Yea, I feel there is a bit of info missing. Why would they only let them talk to their dad’s side of the family?
NTA but I would wait until you are 18 and then start your own phone plan that you pay for.
Don’t throw a tantrum, it will not give you the results you want. I would say to get a prepaid carrier plan. You don’t have to be 18 to get it. Keep it and the phone associated with it hidden. Keep the one they give you or know about to not raise suspicion.
NTA. You bought the phone. You’re almost 18. They’re not parenting, they’re micromanaging. At this point, it’s not about safety, it’s about control. Say something
INFO – are they controlling your screen time on other devices, too? I assume you have to write essays, do assignments, even in HS on a computer. What about watching TV, etc?
If it’s just the phone, you’re seventeen, with a job and bought it yourself? Sounds more like they’re trying to control your ability to communicate with others. Especially given they have stopped you talking to yout Mom before.
How did they get control of the phone you bought?
That’s what throws me off, like you bought a phone set it up and your parents put screen time locks on a phone they do not initially have access to. What did OP do? Say here’s my login info reduce my hours
Note: You’re 17, about to go to university, and you even paid for your own phone. Asking to have your screen time reduced isn’t making a scene, it’s setting a reasonable limit. Controlling who you talk to and restricting yourself like this at this age isn’t parenting, it’s control.