I’m not going to talk about the symptoms, just because this isn’t my place to do that. But I live in a very rural area with limited medical equipment and being undiagnosed is making me feel gradually worse. The doctors told my parents that I’m just anxious, though I have physical evidence it’s not. But my parents are stubborn and their tempers have been running very thin. Here’s the thing. I’m 21, I’m an adult and I don’t have a driver’s license. I’m thinking about rebelling and getting a ticket to a city with a tertiary hospital located hours from home. Part of me wants to obey my parents, something I value strongly. But another part believes if I don’t exercise that I am an adult and that I trust myself more than them, that it’ll cost me. WIBTA?
NTA – fuck your parents, do what’s best for you
Go get checked! NTA! Better be careful and take action for your health than staying home believing them.. Go asap! Good luck!!
My experience has shown me that, if a hospital doesn’t have the necessary advanced equipment to do a test, they won’t recommend it or they’ll say it’s not necessary. GO! NTA
NTA, but you’re an adult and need to make choices for yourself now. Take the trip and get care at a hospital better suited to care for you.
What is your insurance situation? How would you pay for care? Where would you stay? How would you afford travel?
This is all stuff you need to think through.
How are you going to pay for the doctors, medical treatments, and housing etc if you leave?
I am not saying you are wrong to do so, but you need a plan.
If you are going to do this do you have health insurance? Do you work? If you don’t have insurance then pick out the hospital you are going to choose carefully. Will you need charity care? In today’s medical climate, many hospitals won’t let you walk through the door without insurance. Are you planning to just drop into an emergency room? Do you have a doctor you can connect with where you are going? Do you have someplace to stay & money to get you there? Do you have relatives you could go stay with while you do this? You absolutely have the right to choose your own medical care and get answers, but please plan ahead and be safe while you do it. NTA if you do it responsibly.
You aren’t going to just get admitted into a hospital unless there is a severe and immediate medical event occurring. You are NTA for wanting to get more answers as to your medical situation. An urgent care will at least be able to see you right away, but will likely have you follow up with specialists based on what is determined. This process could take an extended period of time during which you will have to live and pay expenses.
You’d be better off going to a Primary Care Physician (PCP). They can test you for whatever, refer you to specialists, or prescribe meds for certain symptoms. You can call around and get pricing or recommendations, but you need to pace and plan. A PCP is significantly cheaper then a hospital
Have you said to them what you said here—“I love and respect you but I need to have better answers for what I’m experiencing. I’d much rather do it with you than without you, but this isn’t optional, I need this.” And see what they say?
Their tempers may be running thin because they are tired of hearing about it or because they are worried about you or maybe because they don’t agree with each other and that can be really challenging. But that is truly their problem to solve.
You are nta and you need to take care of you. I hope you find a way to do it with their support or you find the strength to do it on your own. I’m sorry you are going through this.
It sounds like your parents are doing a number on your development. As you said, you’re an adult. While it’s harder to assert yourself while you’re still living with them, you get to — and should — make your own decisions about your medical care.
One thing really bothering me is why are your doctors sharing protected health information with your parents?? Did you give them permission? Are your parents your legal caregivers because you can’t fully care for yourself for some reason? Because otherwise, those doctors are breaking the law.
Even if you gave the doctors permission to share your information, why did you? Why aren’t you simply telling your parents what the doctors said yourself? When you say the doctors told your parents you’re anxious, are you saying they didn’t tell YOU that?
It sounds from your post like you know you’re legally permitted to make your own decisions. But that means its no longer a matter of “obeying” your parents or “rebelling” against them. As an adult, making your own decisions is just called being an adult.
The most important issue here is your health. As others have said, you can’t just go to another city and be admitted to the hospital. You need a plan. If you have any idea what your diagnosis might be, google doctors within whatever radius you can get to who work in that area. Maybe they can even do a telehealth consultation with you.
NTA for taking care of your own health as an adult.