I have been playing pickleball 3-5 x weekly w/my mom for 9 months. I was helping her find a hobby b4 she retires in a few years. We started at a local park outdoor court using a cheap starter set I bought. When the winter hit, we joined a local club that’s $50 per month. She wants to play for an hour, at least 3 times a week in the afternoon when she finishes work. She doesn’t want to play actual games, just hit the ball back & forth. I have suggested we keep score & play up to 11 best of 3 about 5-6 times, but have to explain every rule, why it’s whose serve or why a point was or wasn’t scored. She refuses to read the rules or play with new people, we have been asked many times to play doubles. She is only interested in counting how many times we can hit it back & forth without missing. I believe a sport is about improving your game, meeting new people & getting in shape so this seems silly to me and lately seems like a waste of my time. Would I be the Ahole for quitting?
YTA.
None is forcing you to play, but perhaps you might not appreciate that your mom is just enjoying spending time with you.
If you are really keen on her learning how to play by the rules or in a game, just jump in a casual one.
YTA. Your mom is getting exercise and just wants to hang out with you. Unless it’s a hardship beyond her not wanting to keep score, I really don’t get your issue.
Info: is the goal of playing to win or to get a workout in? Cause it sounds like she just wants to play for exercise and in that case it doesn’t matter.
YTA . 🤦♂️🙄 I can imagine you bike riding with your mom. She wants to for distance, but you want to go speeding ..
Shut up and spend time with your mom .
Info .
Have you done any interpersonal reflection and maybe figure out if you are just a horribly competitive person to play with
Your mom wants to play for the love of the game, not the love of competition
NAH
your mom wants to be active and hit a ball around. You want to play a specific game. If the way she wants to play and the way you want to play don’t line up, I think it’s more than valid to stop playing together. You can always find something else to do together, you said you were helping her explore hobbies. Maybe there’s something else you two can agree on.
Before quitting, make sure your mom knows how you feel about the way she plays. Maybe she can learn the rules and the two of you can alternate between her casual fun and the fun of a structured game.
Sounds like she just want to get some exercise and spend time with you
Your mom wants to spend time with you. Go ahead and spend time with her. YTA
NAH for quitting. If you’re not enjoying the activity, you don’t have to keep doing it, especially 3x per week.
But you’re an AH for your judgy/gatekeeping of your mom not doing a “hobby” the right way. Like any sport…nothing wrong with having a catch with a baseball or football. Practicing shooting hoops without playing a “game”. Going for a run without racing.
YTA—Your mom isn’t looking to improve her game or be competitive. She’s looking for something she can do with you to spend time with you. It’s no different from a parent playing catch with a child instead of a whole baseball game or casually shooting hoops instead of playing one-on-one.
Nobody is stopping you from going to the club on your own to play more competitively with someone else.
Yes, YTA. Your mom is looking for a hobby, not to be the best pickleball player. If hitting the ball back and forth is what makes her happy, why can’t you support that? Don’t look at it as “playing pickleball wrong”. Reframe it as “hitting the ball back and forth”. Don’t look at it as a sport, look at it as a hobby to keep your mom moving. Not everything has to be done by the rules in order to be fun or worthwhile.
Your mom doesn’t want to learn pickleball. She wants to spend some active time with her son. It’s not rocket surgery dude. YTA
“Why doesn’t my retirement aged mother want to play a sport competitively?”
Is this really a question you need to ask? She just wants a bit of exercise and to spend time with you. She doesn’t want to spend the day nitpicking whether rules are being followed and chasing after balls or dealing with other people who may take **fucking pickleball** seriously.
YTA.