This happened few weeks ago, I (26F) recently moved into a small but nice apartment. I’m really proud of it because I’ve been saving for years to finally live on my own. My cousin Emily (23F) is an aspiring influencer and has been trying to grow her page. A few weeks ago, she asked if she could use my apartment once in a while to film because the lighting is better. I said yes, but with three rules:
1.Clean up after yourself
2.Don’t move my furniture
3. No filming when I’m not home unless I say so
She agreed. Cool.
Well… she didn’t stick to any of it.
Last week, while I was at work, she let herself into my apartment using the spare key I had given her in case of emergencies. She filmed some morning routine aesthetic video. When I got home, my living room looked like a tornado auditioned there pillows everywhere, candles melted into my table, makeup stains on my bathroom counter, and somehow my shower curtain was off the rod? I called her immediately and she got defensive, saying, It’s just small stuff, you’re being dramatic. I told her I’m not a set for her content, and she shouldn’t have been there without permission. She showed up the next day to apologize, but instead accused me of lacking support and said her page isn’t growing because she never has people who believe in her. She even posted a vague passive aggressive story calling people fake family. So I told her calmly that she can’t use my apartment anymore. If she wants to create content, she needs to do it in her own space or rent an actual studio. Now half my family is saying I’m crushing her dreams and being too strict, while the other half says I should’ve taken the keys back long ago. I feel guilty because I know she struggles financially and I didn’t want to be harsh. But I also feel like this is a boundary she kept stomping on, not a one-time accident. AITA for banning her from filming in my apartment?
NTA Anybody who uses a key or anything else without permission loses their access to it in my book. Even without the mess, she had no right being there without you knowing and agreeing. Take back your key and let the criticisers accommodate her recording needs.
NTA you set basic boundaries and she fully ignored them and didn’t give a fuck about any of your stuff, take the key back immediately and keep an eye out in case she got a copy made
You’re not taking her opportunity away, she threw your generosity away
Key back ASAP
NTA
This is absolutely FAFO.or.play stupid games, win stupid prizes. She ran into the natural consequences of her own actions.
You have absolutely nothing to feel guilty about. You granted a favor, with certain VERY reasonable conditions. She ignored those conditions and ran all over you.
I would pick one sentence and use it in varying forms on anyone who says you aren’t being supportive. Something like, “*Being supportive does not extend to having my place trashed. She knew the rules, she ignored them. You’re welcome to let her film at your place, though.*” Or,” I laid specific, but simple, ground rules so this would work for both of us. She didn’t even attempt to follow them. And then blamed me for her bad behavior. I’m glad you’re apparently volunteering to let her use your house.”
Honestly, she probably doesn’t have more followers because she’s entitled, rude, and takes zero responsibility. I can’t imagine her content is that enjoyable.
NTA Get the key back and change the locks.?
NTA
you gave her 3 SIMPLE rules – Honestly it’s kinda insane she broke them so quickly.
She’s already untrustworthy, if you give her any lee-way she will only do worse.
Next it’ll be she breaks things, or throw things out because she thought XYZ would be cuter…in your house, She’ll invite people over to shoot content with them, she’ll re-decorate your room to her taste so people believe it’s hers, etc. etc.
It sounds insane but its happened before. being a push over harms no one but you – so don’t allow it.
NTA – Cousin can get an actual job or do her content at her house but either way this is not your problem. Get your key back and protect your peace.
NTA. Sounds like there’s plenty of family around that she could make her content at their house.
I’m sure every other story on here these days is someone with a family member behaving in a way that no reasonable person would think acceptable, followed by some sort of altercation and family weighing in and blowing up phones etc.
As I the only person left that in the world that this hasn’t happened to? Does everyone’s family have a kick off WhatsApp group now and am I missing out?
Change your locks
Is this a bot?
Btw, NTA.
I’m pretty sure this is almost word for word as a post that went up maybe a month ago. Recycling I guess.
Could be recycling a bot. The story feels off.
This sounds like another family helps family post lol
Nta