My birthday has since come and gone, but for a few months I’ve been stuck thinking about this. My twin believes I’m in the wrong. For context, it was our birthday, and my twin sister, we’ll call ‘T’ was talking about the birthday wishes she got. It’s not unusual for her to get more birthday wishes than me as she is more well known and social, being the ‘loud one’ I don’t mind this, and it’s not really bothered me as the people that don’t wish me a happy birthday don’t really know me or I don’t know them, but she also mentioned getting a phone call from our sister and brother in law. I asked what time they called her and she said they called that morning (birthday morning) at about 10:00. I asked if they asked to speak to me and she said they didn’t. A little hurt, I waited for a phone call for me for the rest of the day but it never came. I don’t let it hold me back from having a good day, but it still hurt. When I mentioned that the next day to my mum, T spoke, saying “If you really wanted a call, why wouldn’t you ring them yourself?” I was a little offended by this, as they had called her, not the other way around, and I thought it could be the same for me. When I mentioned that, she brushed it off saying I was making my own problems. I may be overreacting but like everyone on this subreddit, I’d like to think I’m the asshole, and the situation really hurt my feelings as my own sister would choose not to ring me but still ring T for both of our birthday. For more context, T and I live in the same house and I could’ve talked to them off her phone in the same phone call, but they never asked, and I was unaware the call happened until later, as mentioned. T and I also always see this sister at the same time, so there shouldn’t be bias from hanging out with one of us more either. I may be hanging onto something that shouldn’t matter but I can’t shake the hurt when I see them since. AITA for not calling them?
TLDR: My brother in law and sister rang my twin sister to wish her a happy birthday, and didn’t ring me, justifying it by saying I could’ve instead rang them myself.
Obviously you are NTA for not calling your sister and BIL.
It is strange to me is that they didn’t ask to speak to you after speaking to your twin while on the phone with your twin. However, if you remain passive in circumstances like these and act like it doesn’t matter, people will believe it doesn’t. You have every right to plain out ask your sister why she didn’t wish you happy birthday.
NTA. Why would you ring someone else for **your** birthday? To wish yourself happy birthday? That’s dumb.
Conversation in my head now
“I just called to see if you wanted to say something to me.” … “Oh, I don’t know, Happy Birthday maybe?” … “Ah, so sweet, thank you.”