So I’m 17f and I’m gonna be 18 in January, the issue is with my mom though. I think she thinks that I’m pregnant, but I’m not. My parents were teen parents, and my mom had me at 17. I noticed this a few months ago, how my mom would randomly eyeball me and kind of just watch me. If my stomach was out she’d stare real hard and look at it, sometimes poke it. I’m not pregnant, and there’s no chance that I am. I’m not active like that and never have been, and I get no bitches so it doesn’t really matter anyways. I have no interest in having kids either and both of my parents know this.
Around April-June (whenever the PSAL girls season is) my period was super duper irregular, I was a freestyle wrestler for my high school and dealing with a lot of stress. I was constantly cutting weight and had to practice all the time, I was practicing 5 and 6 days a week. So it would come like once every two-three months. I mentioned it to my parents one time and my dad was joking around and asked if I was pregnant, my mom got super pissy about it and got on my ass about it. Fast forward to now and she just keeps watching my stomach, I’m not skinny at all and so I have pudge on my stomach. But she is just always watching my stomach now and I hate it. I want to ask her what her issue is because the lack of trust kinda hurts my feelings. But I don’t know what to do.
WIBTA for asking my mom why she’s watching me?
NTA You would just be asking a question is all. Maybe make her more aware of her distrustful behavior.
NTA, if you genuinely want this to end your gonna have to have a conversation with her, and I’m sure she’s extra concerned because raising a kid as a teen is difficult and she might be worried about you doing what she did to her own life. It will ease your discomfort and probably her worries too.
NTA – but you know why she is watching you
Better to be direct and ask her stop poking you and also tell your father how you are feeling
NTA, you need to talk to her about this because even as a grown adult this would make me feel weird. I’d feel like she’d either give me trust issues and not feel comfortable going to her if it did happen or an ED because I’d be worried about putting on a little weight and getting called pregnant by my mom. Hopefully you’re more secure in your image than I was at your age. But yeah definitely talk to her and let her know how it makes you feel. Let her know she’s projecting her own issues onto her and that’s not fair to you.
Talk to them. Tell them their lack of trust is demoralizing and hurtful.
And it just sucks cuz it’s like I’d like to think I’ve never done anything to warrant this kinda treatment. Like I’ve never had a boyfriend/girlfriend and I’m home almost all the time, so I don’t have any time to be pregnant/get pregnant.
NTA
At the moment you are telling yourself the story of why your mom is looking at you. It is her story to tell.
If she’s watching you because you have killer abs – great! If it is for the reason you fear – it’s a problem. It’s her problem and she needs to deal with the problem in a way that does not make it yours.
Nta. She’s making you uncomfortable. Make her uncomfortable. Call her out for it
NTA. And have you been tested for PCOS? My two youngest inherited it from me sadly. Can cause pudginess and irregular periods. It also can cause ovarian cysts that can be painful. My youngest is currently dealing with one on each ovary 🙁 she’s only 15
I’ve never been tested for PCOS, and I’m not sure if anyone in my family has it. When I first started getting my period in 5th grade it was irregular but my mom said that was normal because my body was “adjusting.” But it’s pretty normal now I guess, it comes close to the end of each month and skips sometimes.
you wouldn’t be the AH if you asked why, but you don’t need to ask why. you’ve noticed your mom eyeball your stomach, and she’s poked it.
i think a more productive conversation would be had by telling your mom how those actions make you feel. at the same time, it’s important to validate her concerns of you becoming a teen mother.
hopefully, you two are able to reach a solution where you tell her that you’ll take measures to avoid pregnancy until you’re ready for it (if you’ll ever be) and she no longer gawks and pokes in ways that make you uncomfortable
Is your period still irregular? If so tell your mom to take you to the drs to find out why? This way you can try to build trust? Like you body is being weird and you went to her for advice instead of hiding it. Tell her you want to make sure it’s not pcos or hormonal or a tumor of some sort.
just because she got pregnant in her teens doesn’t mean you’re going to. she obviously cares about you and is just worrying but she needs to chill out and give u more trust.
NTA
Take a test and then toss it to her and say “see Im not pregnant! Now stop looking at my stomach!”