I (19, 2nd Year Food Technology student) am currently at my burnt out reviewing for our exams. Since I started my major, I’ve learned exactly how dangerous improper food handling is. I’ve tried to gently teach my family about cross-contamination and temperature control, but they just laugh at me and call me "OA" ( a popular sayings in the philippines which sim0ly means: over-acting).
The breaking point happened yesterday. I saw my mom use the same cutting board for raw chicken and then immediately for the salad vegetables without washing it. When I pointed out that she was literally serving us a "Salmonella cocktail," she got annoyed and told me to "just pray over the food."
I refused to eat the dinner. My dad got furious and said I was being "mayabang" (arrogant) because I’m in college now. I told them that as a Food Tech student, I’ve seen what these bacteria look like under a microscope and I’m not risking a hospital trip. To prove my point, I threw away a batch of sauce they left out on the counter overnight (worth about ₱18,000 / $306 USD if you count the meat so 3,000p for sauce and 15k for opened goods like pineapple chunks and such and meats.. I just referenced what my mother said, as far as I remember, she said that the whole mess costed her 18kP). I couldn’t let them eat it had been in the "danger zone" for 10 hours.
Now the whole house is silent. My mom is hurt because she thinks I’m "disgusted" by her, and my dad says I’m an asshole for "acting like a professor" and wasting food. I feel like I’m the only one being sane here. I love them and don’t want them to get sick, but they treat me like a villain just because I’m using my education to keep us safe.
AITA for choosing science over "family tradition" and refusing to eat their contaminated food?
EDIT: YEAH RIGHT, IM THE A-HOLE, I ALREADY TRIED TO REACH OUT TO MY DEARLY LOVED MOTHER AND FATHER TO COMPENSATE THE THINGS I DID.. ACTUALLY I ALREADY FELT BAD THE TIME I KNEW MY MOTHER CRIED BC OF ME (IVE NEVER MADE HER CRY) BUT I FEEL LIKE THEY DONT GET ME..
I mean….You’re not wrong but it sounds to me like you’re acting like that second year pyschology student who suddenly thinks they knows everything about everyone because of their major. It’s exhausting. You’ve been eating their food for almost 2 decades.
Have to say YTA because you’re being an AH about the whole thing. Your concerns are valid and it’s fine not to eat it if you don’t want to but chill with the preaching.
Food safety is basic shit. A 16 year old burger flipper knows it
Yeah I think food safety is much more black and white than some second year psychology student trying to psychoanalyze someone. The rules are really the rules…it’s not an opinion.
Yea but you’re making that statement ignoring the context around food safety standards. A 16 year old burger flipper knows this because they have been *taught* this and are in a business setting with standards that have to be followed. Not because their friend threw out all their food after refusing to eat their portion. And countries have their own standards. Look towards Canada and the internal temps they need to hit.
Those standards do not apply to your home. That’s why I can cook my chicken below 165 and not get raided by Servsafe. Because I’m not selling it and I have at minimum a basic understanding of pasteurization. Which most people certainly do not gave.
I’d even argue much if food safety isn’t basic. You’re telling me 10/10 people can tell you the temperature to keep your fridge at? And not just a few degrees or so above freezing? Or how long a protein can be cooked in the danger zone before it’s a problem? You’re telling me 10/10 people understand the dangers of botulism?
People can’t even wrap their heads around cooking being a function of temperature *and* time. Hell people can’t even salt their food appropriately.
I completely understand how two grumpy adults who are set in their ways wouldn’t understand food safety.
Soft YTA. You’re right about health concerns and it’s valid in a restaurant. But at home people can cook how they wish. They’ve used these methods their entire life and been fine. I’ve worked in food service, and understand how to keep to health standards and when I cook for people I do this. But I’ve also been at a point where I was homeless and starving and have no issue eating something that fell on the ground or sat out too long. Humans’ immune systems have weakened from cooking food, but that doesn’t mean tolerance can’t be built, which your parents likely have. It’s their home and they can choose to keep or toss food as they please, if it’s not growing mold or showing rot then they’ll more than likely be fine. Education has conditioned everyone to be overly scared of bacteria, but this over avoidance actually makes people worse off at fighting sicknesses because their immune system doesn’t work to build resistance anymore.
People can cook how they want in their homes but no way am I eating salad prepared on the unwashed cutting board for raw chicken.
You’re correct about everything, but you could have gone about it in a more mature way. Also yes, YTA for throwing away that expensive sauce, even if you did think it had gone bad.
YTA – you didn’t just refuse to eat their food (which would have been totally fine), but you threw away food they wanted to eat. Your parents are grown ups and are allowed to make their own wrong choices – if you actually want them to learn and change their behaviour, you’ll need to find a much less aggressive and direct approach.
YTA for throwing out their food, but you are right.
I went to culinary school in the states and learned about safe food handling. There was a lot of things my parent’s did when I was growing up that I would never do today. Also it’s not like we were sick with food poisoning every other weekend so there is some leeway for sure. It’s nice to know better, but it’s up to your family to care about this like you do. Maybe it’s time to start cooking some meals for the family in a way that you are comfortable with, or making small things for yourself. Cooking with your family and teaching them safe food handling is probably the only way you get them to change their habits. Throwing out their food will not help them to understand your perspective ever, but some quality time in the kitchen together might.
Ooh, you pulled out our favorite Big Lewbowski quote:
“You’re right, but you’re still an a-hole”
Soft YTA. You’ve lived with your parents for 19 years. Have they poisoned you in that time? But now because you’ve become a food safety “expert” you act like a health inspector in their home? It’s your choice if you refuse to eat food they’ve cooked, but you don’t throw away somebody else’s food. Also be prepared for the fallout. You could have handled that more diplomatically.
Three HUNDRED dollars of sauce?
Bullshit
Yeah, they lost me there. I splurge on good ingredients sometimes, including some good alcohol for sauces, and have never made one equal to $300.
YTA, but you’re also not wrong. The issue is how you approached it.
So before you went to college, did you eat everything at home without issue? Did your family get sick a bunch? Was your family hospitalized?
They’ve likely been doing this for a long time, so they aren’t just going to change overnight. You need to explain the risks and preventive measures that don’t require much change. Cut the veggies first then the raw chicken so you don’t have to wash the cutting board.
Things sitting out overnight is pretty common in southeast asia. Especially soups, but are you re-cooking it afterwards. If you think about it at big parties food sits out for hours at room temp. And probably a lot of flies too, all the big parties in the Philippines I’ve been too have so many flies.
It’s all about risk reduction and what you’re learning is great for restaurants serving tourists from all around the world, but if you’ve grown up in that environment it’s probably best to take a softer approach.