I (21F) have been consistently ghosted over the past 3 years by my long-distance friend (21F). I moved across the country in middle school, so our only way to communicate is through text (but usually we send voice messages). We became a lot closer when we were around 16, and started talking to each other a lot more. However, there have been periods of time, ranging from 4-10 months, where she completely ignores me without reason. One of these times happened when she was in a bad relationship in college, and the longest period (10 months) happened right after she got out of that bad relationship. I would completely understand if she was going through something very difficult and did not want to talk every day. However, I feel that since she calls me her best friend and says how much she loves me that I at least deserve an "I’m sorry I can’t respond right now" text. I also feel that there is a huge difference between not talking to someone because both people have not texted each other, and flat-out ignoring someone. It also really hurt to see her post about hanging out with her friends where she lives pretty consistently during that 10 month period.
2 months ago, she reached out to me after that 10 month period of not hearing from her. She briefly apologized about ignoring me for so long, and said it was because she became embarrassed to reach out the more time that had passed. I acknowledged her feelings and asked very nicely if she could give me a heads up if it would be several weeks or months before she would reach out to me again. I said this was mostly to make sure that she was doing alright but also to make sure that I haven’t said anything that accidentally upset her.
After our brief reconnection, I have again been ignored for over a month now, besides a "happy birthday" text. I know that not everyone has very few unread messages on their phone, but I feel like I don’t deserve to be given mixed signals like this. I’m also not sure how long to wait before bringing this issue up again, or if I’m being weird about this friendship. Help is much appreciated <3
I’ve lived all over this country, made friends and moved on (I’m in my 40s). I’ve found very few people will keep in touch, if you’re not in their face everyday, most forget 🙁
The list of random “friends” that I’ve had and randomly think about is sad. I try to focus on those that remain in touch.