32M here, gf 32F, wondering if my perspective should be different. Black and white, or not?

I, (32M) here, my gf(32F)was texting, sexting, emotionally involved, with a married man. We’ve been together over a year now. She says she thought they were getting a divorce. They are currently neither separated or divorced. I said “so you were involved with a married man” and she says it’s not black and white like that.

I could see if they were separated, not living under the same roof and sleeping in the same bed, like married couples tend to do. Like yeah there are probably some extenuating circumstances where it isn’t. But I don’t see any here.

Would you say in this case it is pretty much “black and white” and/or what would make it not? I’ll be happy to confer and answer questions.

11 thoughts on “32M here, gf 32F, wondering if my perspective should be different. Black and white, or not?”
  1. I mean there’s every chance he just lied to her and said he was getting divorced, is that not usually how it goes anyway? I’m confused, did she have this relationship while she was dating you, or previously?

      1. Then she cheated on you? At that point I don’t really see it as relevant whether he was married or not, she betrayed your relationship regardless of his marriage status. So what does it matter? Leave her.

          1. Yeah if she’s making whether he’s technically married or not the topic, instead of her literally cheating on you, she’s doing an absolute number on you lol you deserve a lot better than that!

  2. It seems like a lot of the time the man will say that he is not happy in his marriage or that his wife doesn’t understand him something that would make it easier for the other person to validate and justify cheating. And for the man to string the other person along without endangering his marriage.

    I think it’s black and white as well, but people have different moral compasses, with what they consider to be cheating and not cheating.

    I would be worried about dating somebody like that, does that mean if we were married that they would feel it’s okay to engage in that kind of relationship outside the marriage? Judging by their actions they would do that. And that’s not acceptable to me.

  3. Yeah unfortunately it’s not always black and white, but at the same time, he could’ve been lying to her just to get what he wants unfortunately, i honestly think she should stop if it’s something that you both haven’t discussed yet or at least stop until you both come to some comfortable arrangement

    1. She cheated,it is black and white.
      Whether he was married or not,the 2 of you were in a relationship.
      She’s gaslighting the hell out of you.

      Sir,plz tell me you plan to dump this woman.

      Updateme!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *