Since I’ve finally learned how to do my curls cuz before I my hair was horribly messy and frizzy all the time, now my mother complains a Lot of how I take so much time doing my hair like if I could control with which hair I wanted to be born, and then calling me a selfish for taking so much time because I wanted to do my curly hair?? And my routine is not even advanced. She says she wasn’t to straighten my hair but I don’t want to, and personally I think that’s sick, like is something pretty much sickening to think…
Like I just thought that taking a lot of time doing curly hair was normal, ends up that it’s not? (AITA?)
NTA- why does your mother have such a huge problem with you having curly hair? It’s honestly ridiculous that’s she’s getting mad at you for that, it’s just weird and it’s also not even her hair? So wtf is her problem? Oml
sometimes it’s racially motivated if the child is mixed.
Mssing info: how long does it take, does she pay for products and most of all: how are other family members affected? Are you hogging the only bathroom? Is everyone late because your hair takes longer? Is the bathroom more messy?
Without this info, we can’t really decide.
Curly hair takes longer to care for than straight hair and that’s just how life is. it’s not a reason for OP to not be allowed to take care of her hair just because it takes time or to have it straightened against her wishes / ripped through with a brush and made frizzy
INFO: Are you taking time doing your hair that inconveniences other activities? E.g. it making you late for school, excuse for not doing your homework, not coming for a meal when it is ready, spending a long time in the bathroom when other people need it?
No, I normally wake up early when I want to take the time to do my hair because I know It’s gonna take a lot, and when I’m doing it i’m not in the bathroom, we got a small space with a mirror and some wood planks on the wall where you put stuff on but I don’t remember how to say that in English, so in that space I do my hair and use my stuff like hair brush and hair cream. The thing is that I take a time in the morning or several hours before an event to do my hair in that small space so I still got time and arrive early at it. I forgot to specify more in the post tho, I was kinda in a rush.
Info- are you taking so much time to do your hair that you’re consistently being late for things? Or causing her or anyone else to be late?
Because it sounds more like the issue is the time spent on hair care, rather than the fact that you were born with curly hair, which every reasonable person knows is out of your control.
Is doing your hair keeping you from doing things she wants you to do? Is she asking you to do the dishes but you’re saying no I’m doing my hair.
INFO. Do you share a bathroom with her and are taking too much time when she needs to get in and get ready? Or are you making her late when you and she are going somewhere because she’s waiting for you to get ready? Is it possible that it’s not about your hair but about your time in the bathroom affecting her?
I have curly hair and it took me a long time to figure out and manage as a teen. At one point it took me 1.5 hours to get ready. But I started getting ready 1.5 hours before we needed to leave so I didn’t make the rest of my family late. I also shared a bathroom with my sister and we’d have to coordinate our timing.
NTA. I have curly hair (3B). Your mother wanting to straighten your hair is gross and offensive. Curly hair can be a lot to take care of, but it needs to be taken care of. It seems like your mom is pretty ignorant about hair.
NTA. Unless its distracting from chores/studies, it’s really none of her business. Curly hair does require more care than straight hair and theres nothing wrong with wanting your hair to look nice. And she should never be telling you to straighten it, that’s how your hair gets damaged!!
My mom hated my curls she would rip thru it , and with a bristles brush I’m in tears that hurt!!! I was the one asking if she’d help straighten, mistake- i told her about hot irons hahaha lol she brought out the ironing board and iron for clothing plopped my head on that board and starting ironing my hair. That’s how ignorant she was. Always hated my curls too . But mom kept my hair short