Hey! Sorry if I make grammatical mistakes, english isn’t my first language, I really need an opinion on this because my entire family is turning against me
I (22m) have a cousin (Max, 25M) who is in the middle of a divorce with his ex (26F) together they have a daughter (Julia, 5F). The reason for the divorce is my cousin cheating on his ex with multiple of his coworkers. I often babysit Julia and we’re really close. This is going to be important later, but I live in a country which is Dutch and French speaking, my college is a Dutch speaking college, Max and I both speak French and Dutch, Julia only speaks French.
On Sunday, Max sent me a message asking if I could babysit Julia on Tuesday, I told him no because I’ve got school but I could babysit her on Wednesday. Max started insisting saying he has a date with a woman and really needs me to babysit her, I explained to him that I cannot miss this class because the teacher is extremely strict on presences. He kept insisting, telling me we’re too close to the exam period for me to still have to attend class and that I must be lying (the class got moved from last week Tuesday to this week Tuesday because the professor was ill) I sent him my schedule as proof and he left me on read.
On Tuesday, in the middle of my class someone knocked on the door, interrupting the class, Max entered with Julia, he brought her to me and turned around to leave. I asked him if he was serious to which he responded that I’m Julia’s cousin so I am responsible for her. Out of anger I raised my voice and told him (in Dutch) that if he if he could keep his dick in his pants instead of fucking everything that moves he would have someone (his ex) to take care of his daughter when he needed to go somewhere. The class looked at Max, some were laughing, the professor told us to leave, Max ran away and I called his ex telling her everything.
His ex came to pick us up and apologized before bringing me back home. Apparently his ex went to the cops and filled a complaint, she also sent a mail to her divorce lawyer about it. Now my whole family is calling me the asshole for bringing Julia into this (I didn’t, I got angry at Max, but made sure it was in a language Julia didn’t understand), that I’m a snitch and that if Max’s ex gets full custody it’ll be my fault.
My professor sent me a mail telling me that he considers what happened as me being absent in class and that it shouldn’t happen again.
AITA?
Things that didn’t happen for $600.
NTA I’m sorry your cousin takes advantage of you, and of your close relationship with his daughter. He wasn’t acting like a responsible Dad at all, and it’s really good he didn’t get away with it.
I guess shouting that in front of the child is maybe not amazing (if you did), but it’s the heat of the moment.
It makes me feel good when we have one person who is clearly extra and out of line and then we discover thats just how the family rolls.
NTA.
Y’all love drama.
NTA and keep holding max accountable for his poor behavior. Don’t be an enabler because he’s family.
Ah, Belgium.
Mind your language, there are children present.
NTA. Max stomped all over boundaries and acted entitled. Also, your family is enabling him. He is entirely responsible for whatever the consequences will be and you did great standing up for yourself
You called him out for his wrong doing. He was in the wrong for cheating and for interrupting your class to drop off his daughter. If he loses custody, it will be due to his character and behavior, not because you called him out.
NTA. What he did was ostrogeous. He literally took his kid and tried to dump her on you in the middle of your class. This is AFTER you said no. He did this to go on a date.
You called him on his BS in front of everyone and embarrassed him, which he probably thought you would not do in front of the kid or others. You did it in a language the child would not understand.
He just wants to go and get some, this was not an emergency!!!
Its better for this child that the mother has primary custody, as he clearly is not a good dad to do this to his kid. The family needs to be told the whole story and to back up with their criticism!
You stood up for yourself and did not let him run all over you, and do not let anyone else tell you otherwise. You also told the TRUTH. Never let anyone put you down for tellin the truth and standing up for yourself, he’s the hugest AS.
I would tell Max and the entire family if he tries that sh*t again you will call the legal authorities and repot an abandoned child. Everyone seems to be concerned about Max and no one seems to care about his child. He is a sh*tty dad and shouldn’t have custody.
Truth hurts. The wife has every right to feel and do what she feels she should do for her child. Believe me if he put his child first he wouldn’t be divorced.
NTA he basically abandoned his daughter with you in the middle of your class and caused you issues with your professor yet your family thinks you are the problem? Golden child for sure.
Absolutely for certain NOT the asshole. What kind of dad ditches his kid for a date? What kind of person is petty and insolent enough to drop their kid off AT YOUR CLASS when you said no to babysitting? That is appalling behaviour. He should not have custody of that child, and if he loses custody it will be his own fault.
NTA, tell the family it’d be their fault for not volunteering their services to help his cheating self out. You have a life and school to attend, which he knew. I said no, and he didn’t listen. Next time, I could just call the police for child abandonment. Now you know which family members to go no contact with because they’re just like your cousin.