Hello, my sister and I do not celebrate Christmas anymore. But we do try to gift each other stuff. She wished for a big painting of a water reflection plus a salt and pepper set. I bought the set and painted a 90×65 Canvas, and wished for a vintage oil diffuser from Vinted. The cost of her presents without including my time and materials was about 40€ while mine was about 15€. Instead of the oil diffuser she bought me a really cheap diffuser from a drugstore (about 5-6€). I was reallu upset bc I put a lot of effort into her presents. AITA?
YTA. Gifts are about thoughts, not price tags, and you turned it into a comparison
It is thought AND effort. But the sister didn’t put either in.
NTA for feeling a certain way about it. Just don’t exchange anymore. I wouldn’t even bother getting into the differing amounts. Who knows what she may be going through. Just say let’s skip gifts this year.
NTA, you took the time to make sure you got something she wanted and even went out of your way to paint the canvas yourself. You asked for 1 thing, that wasn’t even expensive and you were specific and even said where to find it.
Can understand the frustration 100%
NTA, her getting you a cheaper option isn’t really a problem, but her asking you to gift her quite expensive stuff (think of the time and labor you put in for the painting) then skimping out and not even being willing to spend 8 extra dollars is not nice.
ESH. Yes it’s wrong, but you’re in the wrong to put a price tag on gifts. Gifts are pointless if you’re putting a price on them. That being said, you’re right to be upset about the effort. It shows she didn’t put in any effort, so yeah she sucks for that. Shows that she values her time a lot differently than you do.
Either you can gently let her know (if she’s the kind of person who’ll take it well) or maybe there’s some missing info (in case she’s struggling and you don’t know)
My sister did this and many times gave nothing, despite it being a voluntary name draw. Give the same level as your sister next year, little to nothing
Only if you don’t broach the subject with her.
It’s a little rough, you put in effort, she tells you what she wants, yet your effort wasn’t reciprocated. You should feel good about your effort, it was a gift. Her gift I would ask for the receipt for a return ( or make her do it ) because it’s just not something you want, go get the one you want.
Sidenote, I am more angry at the little to no effort. I was very clear of what I wanted, sent several links and it was swept to the side. The money is part is not really an issue bc she is a student but it was something cheap that wouldnt cost her a leg.
The time and care you put into a handmade gift matters way more than the price tag.
NTA. Just match her energy. Use the money you would have spent on her buying yourself something or save it
ESH. i understand getting a drugstore diffuser is frustrating, however, yta for putting a price on gifts without clearly communicating your expectations of how much you wanted her to spend on you