Well, ex. We broke up over Thanksgiving.
But prior to, as I was sitting beside him on the couch he had his search bar open and Grindr was there. That is all I saw, recent searches: Grindr.com, along with a few other innocuous things he had recently searched.
I never said anything or asked him about it. Frankly he has a temper so I didn’t want to.
He also posts REALLY awful things about women on his X account. Especially "western women". Calls them trash, c*nts, hormonal, wh*res, unsuitable for marraige, demons, etc etc.
Follows a lot of MGTOW (men go their own way) pages too.
He had bad trauma regarding his biological mother and other women growing up.
And despite 20 years of off and on between us, refused to talk to me about marraige or our future. Always blamed me for why we weren’t married. Cited I wanted a big wedding and fancy ring. Literally neither of those were true. I have two friends and basically no family. Big wedding isn’t even feasible if I did want one.
I finally called it quits due to some holiday chaos on his end. And I am a broken mess from it all. Psychologically so twisted up and confused. I truly love this man but I am tired.
Men, any input on what all of that together means? The awful posts, Grindr, mgtow following, lack of commitment, bad temper, low sex drive, etc.
Heart break does some weird things to our thought processes and I don’t know up from down right now.
Sounds like a catch. 🙄
I feel like you already know the answer to this question and you are just coming here for confirmation but I think you should go with your instincts on this one….
I feel like grindr was the absolute least of your concerns, and the fact that THAT is what stood out to you the most is baffling.
Yeah really buried the lede here lol
No. He’s like that because hes self loathing and in the closet
Honestly, the fact that he had a bad enough temper that you were afraid to ask him stuff and wrote misogynistic stuff is a disqualifier I would think. Everything past that is just icing on the terrible cake.
Edit to clarify: a disqualifier from being a good boyfriend. I won’t even speculate as to his sexual alignment
Your gay boyfriend has a temper so bad you’re afraid to confront him because of it?
I think you know the answer, no?
I mean there is a big possibility he is just kind of bi-curious , I could sit here and talk shit but also I could be honest and I am a straight happily married man who has consumed plenty of gay porn, been on grindr, done just about everything short of having an actual physical gay experience and after exploring my curiosities I think a lot of it rooted from some sexual trauma that I had when I was younger and I still consider myself a very straight man but I’m also a good husband so there are some things in my personal experience that don’t line up with what you just stated but they are similar and I do love My Wife . So it might not be all bad. So maybe disregard my last comment I apologize for making it so quickly without really examining my own behavior. I was also honest with My Wife about this side of me and told her everything and that was a very relieving thing for me to be able to do because I had never told anybody
Move on. Stay moved on.
I mean the real question is why do you care? And even bigger question why were you ever with him in the first case? I can’t imagine being alone could possibly be worse than that guy.
But no, not too likely it was a fluke. He was either on it because he hates gay people, or he was on it because he is a closeted self hating gay man, possibly both.
I mean im technologically out of touch and heard someone talking about grindr years ago and googled it. Then went oh. People Google shit. Thats what we do. Did he download it? Is he on it?
I mean i literally have shit in my browser like, “did Hitler really say x”, because we read some stupid meme online and go Google it.
LMAO you will find grinder in my search bar and that is only because I was investigating the stock as a potential buy. I even had a rainbow flag due to work, my team ended up being the raindbow..so it may not be what you think it is.
So I’m bi and this guy is clearly either bi or gay.
But… he also hates women and probably hates himself and can’t accept his sexuality.
His problems run a lot deeper than his sexuality, because he doesn’t know himself and doesn’t know how to regulate himself.
He’s not even worth the energy to think about.