I’m from Valencia, Spain. In Valencia, we have 2 official languages, Valencian and Spanish. I’m in 4º de la ESO which is is 10th grade in the US, and my head teacher is the Valencian teacher. Before Christmas break, in a class which is called "tutoria" (basically a class dedicated to discussing class problems and stuff) the teacher was giving out our 1st semester grades and talking to us 1 by 1 about them. When my turn came, he was speaking to me in Valencian, which is fine, but my main tongue is Spanish, so I just prefer to speak in Spanish. But he apparently didn’t really appreciate how I was talking to him back in Spanish, and as he was about to tell me to go back to my seat he said that I was being very disrespectful by not speaking back in Valencian. I could’ve just said sorry and let it go but I’ll admit my pride got the better of me and I decided to push back a bit, and told him that in this class I didn’t need to talk to him back in Valencian. He then said that it didn’t matter, if you know the language you’re being spoken to in, it’s good manners to reply back on that same language. We went in this back and forth and eventually he told me to just go back to my seat and he said he would call my parents (he actually did) because of my direspectful behavior. My parents basically kind of picked the middle option where I should’ve talked to him in Valencian but he shouldn’t have made a big deal out of it. Ever since then (this happened before Christmas break) I can tell the teacher’s opinion of me has clearly lowered and he’s probably still a bit mad about it. AITA?
EDIT: Grammar and vocabulary
Your parents are right
ESH
Don’t fight with teachers for no reason, it will never be a net positive
YTA if you know the language yeah, it’s incredibly rude to respond in a different one.
NTA
Your parents have the best take. They’re going to be inclined to be on your side, but also want to value what is in your best interest. It’s not a good idea to piss off a teacher even if they’re wrong. And he was only partly wrong. Presumably he has an interest in preserving the language, so uses it and wants others to use it.
Your parents are right. ESH.
He was doing a weird power play, but you’re doing one right back. You’re arguing he should’ve bent to your whims, while also arguing you shouldn’t have been made to bend to him.
Both of you have a weird attitude.
YTA
This seems like picking a fight over nothing to me. Unless you are not able to speak the language you were being addressed in (which is not the case), I would have just responded in the language the teacher spoke to you in. The teacher is correct that it is rude to respond in a different language than the one you are being addressed in.
INFO – the teacher is Valencian himself (as in that is his native language or first language)? Or he is the instructor of the Valencian Course?
That changes the context a bit.
In one sense, your teacher is speaking their easiest language and you are speaking your easiest.
In the other, your teacher was attempting to speak to you about your coursework *in the language of that course*, and you intentionally chose to speak a different language – which *is* disrespectful in that context.
YTA.
Kinda seems rude to not respond to someone in a language they know that you speak.
Also a teacher talking to a student isn’t exactly 2 adults on equal footing in a neutral environment. There is an implied respect.
Yta. It was very disrespectful you know the language.
He also knows Spanish
So he was talking to you, in the language he teaches you, about your grade in that language class. And you figured this was the time to make a stand on speaking Spanish? This is a read the room situation and it was a bit of a bratty move, so YTA.