I 40F just got into a heated argument with my husband 41M regarding cleaning habits. We’ve been together about 15 years and this is an ongoing issue. He has these pet peeves about how other people clean that I think are too rigid. Some of this is also related to ongoing issues of him being hypercritical.
This time it was over our daughter (13) bringing a load of dirty laundry downstairs as she was cleaning her room. To me this is a logical first step with cleaning any space. Remove whatever does not belong in the room. Or in this case a task that can be separated/started to optimize time. She couldn’t put anything in the washer as it was occupied with his laundry that has been in there for days. He gets really irritated about dirty laundry piling up in the laundry room. Understandable as our laundry room is really small and it obstructs the washer/dryer. However, if it’s kept in a hamper/bag it’s easy to move.
Similar arguments have occurred over dishes in the sink. For example when I clean I will put all the dirty dishes in the sink as I’m collecting them, then put everything in the dishwasher at once as opposed to opening the dishwasher several times to put each piece in. This bothers him.
In fact just last we week we argued because he got upset with her after he asked her to make sure her laundry was out of the machines before she went to bed that night (Monday night) but she didn’t. Mind you this was laundry she had started that same day after school. However, the same issue had occurred where he had left his laundry in the machines all weekend and some of the week prior preventing either of us from getting our laundry started.
Sure keep up with your own responsibilities. Clean up after yourself and don’t leave piles of laundry or dishes for someone else to take care of.
However, I feel like he is being unreasonable and just needs to get over these things. Sinks are meant to hold dirty dishes and dirty clothes belong in the laundry room.
Am I the one wrong here or him?