Recently I’ve noticed two of my closest friends starting to put me more on the sidelines. Over time, they spoke to me less and less until they weren’t really talking to me at all or making much eye contact. At first I didn’t address it and just carried on with my other friend and my boyfriend, because I didn’t have the energy to deal with it at the time.
I’ve been dealing with anxiety, which can be quite bad some days, and I’ve been struggling a bit in the mornings at school because I haven’t felt fully myself. This week I also took a couple of days off because my childhood cat became unexpectedly ill and passed away, which was really upsetting.
By the weekend I felt overwhelmed and decided to ask my friends what was wrong, hoping to clear things up so next week wouldn’t feel as awkward.
I messaged them separately. The first girl said she thought I had an issue with her, which confused me because I felt I’d been shut out first. The second girl told me I’d been “doing a lot of things” that made me unpleasant to be around, and said I’m lovely when I’m in a good mood but when I’m not, she’s “happy to take a step back.”
I was confused because I couldn’t think of anything specific I’d done to be rude, so I asked for an example so I could understand. She refused to give one and continued responding sarcastically, which made the conversation feel dismissive rather than constructive. This has happened before she’ll stop talking to me, say I’ve been unpleasant when I ask why, and then act like nothing happened later.
I stayed polite throughout, but I left feeling blamed without being given a chance to explain how I felt.
Because of this, I’m planning to distance myself for now instead of trying to fix things again.
AITA for stepping back from these friendships rather than pushing harder to resolve it?