My girlfriend family get together around twice a year to catch up. We just go to a local pub and book our a room. I’ve been with my girlfriend for 5 years so I know her family pretty well.
My girlfriend is close to her cousin who turned 18 last month. Her cousin has joined us on days out, meals our etc so I get on well with her. My girlfriend family had a meet up last weekend.
I was in the bar waiting for a drink and my girlfriends cousin joins the queue for the bar behind me. I notice her and make small talk then offer to buy her a drink as a late birthday present. She accepts and I get her a drink.
Her mum mentioned ot my gfs mum that she saw me buy the drink and stand around talking to my gfs cousin. She said she thinks it’s inappropriate since her cousin has just turned 18 and I’m 28 and she said I should apologise and not do it again.
My gf mentioned this to me and I refused to apologise. I said I’ve done nothing wrong and I was just being polite and friendly. My gf said maybe I should do it to keep the peace but I refused.
AITA for buying my girlfriends cousin a drink?
Dude what a weird ass exhausting family. Not weird behavior on your part at all.
I wouldn’t apologise to your girlfriend’s aunt about an interaction between you and your girlfriend’s cousin because your girlfriend told you her mother told her that her aunt told *her* she didn’t like it. That’s too much indirection to be worth your time.
I also don’t see that there’s a breach of the peace to be repaired here. If it bothers the aunt she can talk to you about it. If she isn’t willing to take that trouble then maybe it’s okay for her to be unhappy about it on her own time.
NTA run, run so far away if Moms painting you like that your always gonna be someone to be “cautious” of. They don’t trust you stop wasting your time.
NTA – you bought someone you’ve known since they were 13 years old a birthday present and talked to them in a public space. I fail to see how this is inappropriate. Now, if you were being flirty, yes, that would be a problem but just “I’ll grab you a beer. Happy Birthday!”? That’s pretty normal behavior.
NTA – You are free to buy anyone you want a drink for their birthday. Your age and her age have nothing to do with it since you can both legally drink.
Also apologizing for giving a gift that was appreciated is weird.
NTA – it’s really odd that they’re reading anything more than a friendly gesture, especially considering she’s not a random 18 year old but your gfs cousin
So:
* the family had a meetup at a place with a bar
* You, your gf, and your gf’s cousin were all attending that meetup
* You bought her a drink as a birthday present at this event full of family members, including your gf
You did absolutely nothing wrong, and those mothers sound REALLY exhausting.
NTA.
NTA, you have been with your gf for long enough that you probably view her family as your own, so you basically bought a drink for your own cousin. In a public place. Where the rest of the family was too. Nothing nefarious there
NTA you used pub which makes me assume you are maybe British which makes it even more NTA. There is nothing wrong with buying essentially a family member a drink
If 18 is a legal drinking age where you are then you have done absolutely nothing wrong. It was a nice gesture to buy a drink for a family member.
NTA…. Buying a family member a drink for their 18th birthday is a normal, friendly gesture, especially after knowing them for five years. Since you were in a public room full of family, the mother is likely overreacting, but you shouldn’t apologize for inappropriate behavior you didn’t commit.
NTA
Seriously? It was a birthday gift, you weren’t flirting. OP don’t apologize you have nothing to be sorry for.
NTA. You were doing a kind thing and they’re making it weird for some reason. Your gf should be shutting them down instead of bothering you for doing something nice for someone
NTA your gfs family is basically insinuating that your 1, a creep, and 2, potentially going to cheat on your gf with her cousin
Also its your gfs responsibility to deal with her family, not yours. She should be stepping up and telling them to stop.