Rose (33F) and I (36F) met in a dating Facebook group. We joined several gatherings in the group and became very good friends. She is very logical; I love to have her analyzing questions for me.
A few months ago, we both met our guys and started relationships. Rose was doing great with her bf, but I broke up with mine. Before breaking up, I texted all my problems and concerns to Rose daily to have her opinion. She always replies to me patiently and gives great advice. I rely on her very much.
I value her as my best friend, and I tend to include her in everything in my life. However, she is more willing to text instead of call/hang out frequently. I feel uncomfortable for her to keep space from me, especially when I just broke up and need a friend’s care.
I understand that she wants to stay with her boyfriend during weekends, so whenever I ask her out, I invite her boyfriend too. However, she told me that I was ‘too clingy.’ She also said if I have an important issue or problem, she is happy to reply at once. But it’s just ‘casual chatting’; she wouldn’t want to feel like she’s obligated to reply to me immediately. But to me, I have just broken up, I am fragile and didn’t recovered yet, ‘casual chatting’ to me is very important.
Rose and I both left the dating group after we met our guys. But after breaking up, I am joining new groups, and I planned to join some gatherings to meet new guys. But this time, Rose refused to go with me. I felt like she’s not on my side when I really need her support.
AITA to request my friend spend more time on me because I broke up?
You are too clingy and needy. YTA
YTA. You shouldn’t really rely on someone to solve all the problems your having. Especially not daily. It can put a lot of pressure on the person. She wants space to do her own stuff.
I had to double check the age to confirm you’re 36. This is the behavior of a high schooler.
Perhaps instead of joining more dating groups, your time might be better spent in therapy to look into why you’re latching onto someone you haven’t known too long so hard. I’d venture a guess that she doesn’t consider you two as close as you do.
YTA