So me and a best friend had a fallout over our differences in stuff, but I want to explain this one scenario where it was a trip. So we got to Miami, she asks whose sunscreen we’re going to be sharing. I’m confused, because we each have our own (there’s 3 of us), but when I ask why she can’t just use hers suddenly I’m selfish and stingy, but I’m thinking, if u wanted to share why not tell me before the trip then we could buy a big enough one for the both of us like I did with my other friend? Because I don’t think it’s fair to want to use the one small bottle and then it runs out and u get to go home with a full sunscreen spray. She says I’m being silly and that it’s called being generous I would get it if she had none, but our differences stem mostly in sharing and while I’ve been stingy with other things, I do feel as if my point made sense here. She says she’s used to her friends doing stuff for her and being a giver regardless of how much money they have, and that she can just replace stuff and it’s no big deal, she shares her stuff, whereas with me and my friends we always pay each other back or split fare when it comes to like Ubers, to me it felt like u wanna be spoiled and greedy and inconsiderate of my money problems? Am I in the wrong?
NTA – people shouldn’t feel entitled to your stuff. Your “friend” is weird and sounds selfish. If it was really about sharing, why didn’t she offer up her spray sunscreen for everyone to use?
NTA she’s being entitled… to a really weird thing. Like if you forgot your bottle one day, sure no problem. But what the hell is the point of sharing sunscreen if you all have your own???
You said she’s is a friend? Hmm
NTA. Just because you’re her friend does not mean she is entitled to your stuff. It’s manipulative & greedy.
You’re not in the wrong at all! But also are you an only child? I feel like I wouldn’t even think anything of this but I’ve have the same friends for 15 years so idk
NTA.
AITA gets a lot of posts where one friend feels entitled to help themselves to another friend’s belongings, and then says “You’re selfish!” when there’s resistance.
My rule of thumb is this:
Friendships go a lot more smoothly when one friend never feels resentful that they’re subsidizing or being taken advantage of by the other. That means no borrowing money other than in an emergency, promptly paying back what you borrowed if it was an emergency, no helping yourself to their stuff without asking, and no assuming they will let you share their stuff.
You are always free to OFFER your stuff to a friend. It’s nice if you’re in a position to do so, and a bit of generous give and take helps make for a warm relationship.
But you are never obliged to give your stuff to a friend, and they should never assume they can share it. They should either ask politely (if there’s a good reason why they don’t have their own stuff), or wait to be offered, and if the answer is “no” or the offer doesn’t come, that means no one is sharing anything.
Your friend just assumed, and then called you selfish when you objected. That makes her the asshole.
Also if you all have your own sunscreen, it’s really weird that she’s expecting any of you to share it.
YTA
It’s sunscreen, not a car. This has got to be the pettiest complaint that I’ve ever seen on this website also YTA for bothering to write this out in a post about somebody you claim is your friend. But all you did was say bad things about her.
NTA. Why do you have the be ‘generous’ and ‘a giver’ just because she’s used to it. How entitled.
Should have answered “OK, we’ll share yours then, since you asked.”
Sunscreen? YTA
How much was the sunscreen? If you could afford a trip to miami (very expensive city) you shouldn’t be making a big deal out of sunscreen. I get your point but it’s petty. I used to have a friend like you, wanted to split things down to the penny. It got annoying fast. Like today I’ll buy your drink, tomorrow you buy mine…it’s not hard but don’t send me $17.11 ffs. Don’t be cheap. There’s a difference between frugal and cheap. YTA.
All this drama over *sunscreen*? How old are you people – 14? 13?
YTA for the sheer pettiness.
YTA you have MULTIPLE posts over MULTIPLE days about sunscreen. Are you ok OP? I don’t think you’re old enough for Reddit.
lol I’m 24, I am new to this sub and thought my post wasn’t posting because I missed the message saying to confirm so it got deleted