I (27m) and my party guest, lets call him Bob (28m) have known each other for about 10 years. We used to hang out a lot and had mutual friends. However, hanging out with him was starting to feel weird. He would randomly bring up times when I got drunk and embarrassed myself. It made me uncomfortable. I decided to start distancing myself. Last year, about a week before the superbowl he texted me again to hang out. I told him I can’t and that him bringing up my embarrassing drunk moments made me uncomfortable. He apologized and said that he didn’t mean to make me uncomfortable. He texts again and said he heard im having a superbowl party at my house. I knew he was fishing for an invitation so I invited him since he knew everyone who was gonna be there. He said thanks and I thought that would be it until the party. Within the next week he asked me what time the party started, which I’ll admit is a perfectly normal question (I told him 5:30), however, he would end up asking me twice on two separate days. He also asked who was gonna be there, as well as if he could bring his extremely weird friend. I said "no." All of the other guests asked, in a separate group chat, what they should bring. At no point did Bob ask what he should bring. Now the day of the superbowl came. Bob texted to ask if people showed up yet, I said yes and he said he’d be there by 7:30. I said "dude, either come or don’t. Stop grilling me about the party." He finally showed up with pizza just for him. For the rest of the night I ignored him.
NTA this guy is weird and time to let him go.
YTA. You clearly didn’t want him to come so you shouldn’t have invited him. Inviting him, then ignoring him when he showed up is rude.
Why is this posted here? Where’s the conflict?
This has bothered you so much that you have to ask Reddit after at least a year has passed by?
I just started using reddit. This is actually my first post.
Yeah but this year’s Superbowl hasn’t happened yet, so this was some that happened at least a year ago. Like you said in your post now that I’m rereading. That’s an awfully long time to be concerned about the situation.
It sounds like there’s a lot of discomfort with him crossing boundaries. First, by bringing up embarrassing details then by pressuring an invite out of you. I think once you invited him, you should have been gracious though. Unless there’s something seriously wrong with his friend, he should have also been allowed to bring them.
….did this happen a year ago?
Bringing food *only* for yourself to a Super Bowl party—the single most communal eating event in American culture—is a social felony. He tried to bring an ‘extremely weird friend’ because he knows *he* is on thin ice. He wanted a human shield. If the weird friend is there, Bob looks normal by comparison. It is a classic deflection tactic. You distanced yourself for a reason (him bringing up your past), and he spent the entire week proving that your instincts were correct.