My friends recently had a fight, it’s a long story but one of our friend( A)wanted space because she wasn’t happy with friend (B) ( and some other of our friends as well, but they’re not that important to this story) she said she needed distance and in that distance got with the 2 years situationships of Friend (B) they had a long history together so it was kinda a big deal, Friend(B) is pissed and told her to f**k herself basically. Now Friend (A) had already stopped talking to the group and has removed everyone including me but i still interacted with her when we see eachother even tho i don’t hangout with her individually or initiate anything.
Everyone thinks what she did was f**k up doesn’t want to talk to her but i don’t want to be mean or ignore her when i see her in person. The reason why i don’t want to ignore her and all that stuff is because one of the reasons friend (A ) stopped being friends with the group is because her best friend also our friend kissed her boyfriend when we all went out. The best friend calls and confessed and she was not happy about it as you can guess. Side note friend (A) and boyfriend just made their relationships open that same day but he still kissed her best friend that same day so idk if it being open even helps but everyone kind of decided the best friend actions were not that bad because the boyfriend is horrible and has made everyone uncomfortable and friend (A) was aware of that and still continued to allow it, so what did you kinda expect yk.
Anyways so my point is if we’re gonna be okay with best friends action and still be friends with her i don’t think friend (A) deserves to be ignored or for me to hate her, i feel like it’s kinda hypocritical to pick and choose whice one deserves to be forgiven and which shouldn’t when technically the severity of both actions is kinda similar. I’m not friends with A anymore but i was friends with her for some time and I’d feel weird ignoring her because of what happened between them all, i think she kinds deserve some sort of sympathy looking at the situation she’s in right now and i don’t want to jump on the group hate like how everyone is doing.
Now i’m concerned because if friend (B) finds out I still talk to friend (A) and was being nice to her she’ll feel some sort of way about it and not be happy with me because friend(B) and I are really close and i should probably have her back, i honestly don’t care about the entire thing like they do but i should because it must’ve really hurt friend(B) a lot to see her former friend do this to her so idk how to act when i see friend(A) anymore. This is missing a lot of context since i can’t really put everything into writing here but AITA?
You are either in late highschool/early college years or you severely need a friend group with less drama.
NTA for hanging out with both A&B, but if I were you I’d be upfront about doing so, in the hopes that they’d quit talking to me too, and free up my time and energy for other things.
If friends feel the need to regulate your friendships with others; then they are not your friend! Why do they feel they can do this to you? It’s a control thing! NTA
NTA. You don’t need to explain yourself. If anything, tell B that the way she’s feeling is the same was that A felt but she lost all of her friends, even you, because of it. Sounds like they betrayed her first. So if you see A in public and talk to her, that doesn’t mean you’re betraying your friend, it means you’re a good person just having a friendly conversation with someone you used to know
You don’t need all the drama. Decide for yourself who you do and do not want to be friends with and let the rest of them figure things out for themselves. NTA