When I was doing theatre, I used to work with an actress who was the main character of a TV show I used to watch in school. I recently decided to visit the theatre she’s currently working at while on holiday and I catched up with her. The topic drifted to the show (It was her first acting role and she’s nostalgic about it) and I decided to share an unpopular opinion I had that I never told her. I did warn her it might be a bit upsetting but she said she’d like to hear it.
I told her I thought it was really disappointing she never returned for the 2nd season. Her character just disappears, they replace her with her “younger sister” who just appears out of nowhere. Her character is not mentioned at all in any way in the 2nd season despite having the same continuity which I always found bizarre and cold.
She said she did regret not returning but just was offered more interesting roles at the time. I told her I thought the actress who replaced her was pretty bland, really wooden acting and less dynamic than she was. I said she’ll always be the 2nd rate version of her season 1 character. She replied saying I’m being a bit harsh. I agreed but I again reiterated it would have been much better if she continued her role. I then asked, why she didn’t return for the reboot/third season of the show which was aired 20 years after the 1st and 2nd seasons (it was a continuation of it, the actor who played her dad reprised his role as well as her replacement, with the same continuity). She replied that she did regret that too but just felt she was too old for it at that point. I said “It was a missed opportunity for you, I mean you weren’t really doing anything major at the time, it would have been really heart-warming for fans to see you return again”.
This offended her and she assumed I was judging her. She then said maybe her husband shouldn’t have given me training or work when I applied after school. I felt hurt by that and explained to her that I’m not trying to offend her, just that I feel that it was a missed opportunity for her not to return and it possibly harmed the reboot’s ratings. I made an anecdote in my school, there was a lot of talk about the show being rebooted and whether she would return and it was disappointing she didn’t. She then said “Okay, well I don’t appreciate how you talked about [the replacement actress] and trying to make me feel guilty about my career choices”. I apologized and then decided to leave, feeling hurt that she felt I antagonized her. I never intended that, I was just giving my opinion that I did make clear might upset her and she said she was fine to hear it. I also feel hurt by her saying her husband shouldn’t have cast me when I first started, very uncalled for and below the belt. She was a real mentor figure for me back when I was doing theatre and I didn’t expect what I said to be upsetting for her. AITA?
YTA Criticizing someone’s career choices and shit talking someone else is not good conversation material for a catch up meeting.
YTA
Why do you feel compelled to continuously tell her why what she decided to do was wrong? It seems like you are very motivated to make sure she knows that you weren’t satisfied with her not returning after she explained in several different ways it wasn’t what she wanted and even told you to have some grace on the other person
>She replied that she did regret that too but just felt she was too old for it at that point. I said “It was a missed opportunity for you, I mean you weren’t really doing anything major at the time, it would have been really heart-warming for fans to see you return again”.
Yikes. YTA. Like, did you just want to make her feel like shit?