I’m 15F. This happened at school last week.
One of my friends (15F) often borrows stuff and “forgets” to return it. It’s annoying but I usually let it go. This time she asked to use my lip balm during lunch because hers was finished. I said okay, but told her to give it back after.
She kept it the whole day. I reminded her twice and she kept saying “later” or joking about it. At the end of school, I asked again and she said she didn’t know where it was and that it’s “just lip balm.”
That annoyed me because it wasn’t cheap and it was literally mine. I told her she should replace it if she lost it. She got defensive and said I was being dramatic over something small. Now some friends are saying I made it awkward and should’ve just dropped it.
I feel like if you borrow something and lose it, you replace it. AITA?
Hi! NTA.
We’ve all loaned things to friends. And we’ve all had friends who decided not to give things back despite us asking for them to do so.
At your age, it’s really hard to buy things and replace them, and your friend was testing your boundaries.
Most likely, she didn’t lose your lip balm. While it’s not worth losing friendship over, it’s also worth noting that she’s unreliable to loan things to in the future.
Of note, never share lip balm. You can end up getting nasty infections, and some are permanent and can increase the risk of oral cancers (herpes simplex virus).
Your friends are also her friends, so take their advice with a grain of salt. You’ll meet more friends as you go through high school and college and this will be a fading memory. Don’t let it get you down, OP. It’s not worth it.
💗
NTA but I suggest never let a teenage girl borrow anything or this will happen to you a lot in your teens. The amount of clothes, purses, make up and books I never saw again from friends was heart breaking.
NTA – but when you next see her, tell her you’ve just been diagnosed with a contagious skin condition.
NTA when I was a lot younger I had friends do this sort of thing to me borrow something and not return it. So I stopped loaning them things.
NTA, just don’t give her things anymore if she has this habit of not returning them. She can ask your other friends if she needs something, surely they don’t mind never getting them back.
I never had friends that blamed me for wanting something back from another friend, they are being weird about it, then again it’s been a while since I have been a teenager so maybe different times.
NTA, I wouldn’t lend them anything anymore and if they ask why state that you never get them back and can’t afford to keep just giving things away
YTA to yourself for sharing lip balm with someone. That is very unsafe
100% agree with you. Never share anything that goes on your lips or eyes. A great way to get conjunctivitis and herpes.
NTA. If she thinks it’s “just lip balm,” then she shouldn’t have a problem buying another one.
NTA. But you should drop it for now. Go get a new lip balm, and eat the cost as a lesson learned. Whenever she asks to borrow anything ever again, even as small as a pencil, simply say no. Just don’t lend her stuff again.
lip balm is not something I would let anyone use. But growing up there was a bunch things that could be passed around. Cold sores pink eye ( eye liner and mascara) so i don’t share that type of thing with anyone.
Nta but she should replace it. I don’t think I could remain friends with someone who made a big deal out of something so minor. If its not a big deal then just replace what you took.
NTA, but for the love of god please do not sure beauty products with your friends, especially lip products, as you can pick all sorts of things from friends and even family.
The herpes simplex virus is incredibly common and there’s no knowing whether or not she had it or if she did whether she had a cold sore whilst using it. I’d write the lip balm off along with the friend.