Today me and my husband were in the kitchen each making our own food. i was making an english muffin on the pan and he was making breads with cheese in the pan. he randomly left the kitchen to go sit on his phone and i took my english muffin off of the pan and started buttering it. while this was happening i didn’t notice his sandwiches he was making were starting to burn. when i noticed i asked him if he wanted me to flip it and he said no, and then i said i think it’s burning and he said to flip it then. i flipped it and it was already burned. i could tell he was mad so i offered to make him another one and he said no. he started saying things like “you can’t watch one thing. effing unreal.” I understand maybe i should’ve been watching it, but i don’t think im in the wrong as he shouldn’t have left while he was making food. He told me that this was american individualist selfish mindset. and that if there was a drowning baby i wouldn’t save it because the mother should be watching it.
NTA, ditch the sandwich and the husband. He walked away, he told you not to flip it, then he got fanny bothered when it burned. Because you followed his directions, which you wouldn’t have to if he was paying attention. Are we seeing the theme here? He squirreled up and now he’s mad at you. He’s the AH not you.
NTA. He didn’t ask you to watch it. You noticed when it was burning, you only know its burning when it’s too late. That’s on him. If going in the other room to be on his phone was more important than the time sensitive task of making food in a hot pan then he can only be mad at himself.
NTA.
he left food on the pan and walked away. that’s on him.
also comparing burnt bread to a drowning baby is… a wild level of escalation over a sandwich.
you even offered to make another one.
sounds less like burnt bread and more like he just wanted someone to blame.
NTA. Buddy, your sandwich is not a baby.
So he was cooking something and then *left the kitchen.* He didn’t communicate that he wanted you to finish making his meal, he just *left.*
Then, you ask him if he needs help and *he says no.* It burns and then *he blames you.* Not only is it your fault, you’re a “selfish American.”
Yeah, okay buddy … NTA.
NTA
I think it’s quite an (American?) selfCENTERED mindset to just leave a pan on the stove and expect that whoever is in the kitchen just watches it.
I hate when people offer a solution to someone’s problem, the person says ‘no’ but keeps nagging or cursing about what went wrong.
Dude compared a sammich to a baby drowning wild
Love that he lives in a world where the value of a drowning baby’s life is equivalent to the value of his burnt sandwich.
NTA.
wow, that’s quite a escalation! By his logic, he would toss his own baby in a pool and walk away saying “eh, someone will save it”
i mean. in his analogy the mother literally told you not to save the baby. which is odd, to say the least.
he was irresponsible. he wandered away from his food, rebuffed you when you tried to help the first time, and still made it your fault after you helped him. NTA. what is this behaviour.
“My wife is there, I can stop doing this task because she will take care of it.” – Your husband
And if it had been reversed? I think we know how it would go.
“You can’t watch one thing…” …did he -ask- you to watch them? Or just wander off because you were there?
NTA and you two need to have a a serious talk.
>“you can’t watch one thing. effing unreal.”
I mean, neither can he apparently, since he doesn’t even have the attention span required to flip a sandwich *already cooking in a pan.* NTA.
He leaves you to finish cooking his food for him in the middle of cooking your own (without telling you), while he does nothing in the other room, and you’re the selfish one?
NTA for sure.
it makes me so sad that your immediate reaction was to offer to make him a new one and questioning yourself like maybe you should’ve watched it etc.
He was in charge of his own food.If he had asked for your help, sure, but he didn’t say anything and then got mad at YOU because he fucked up? what a child