My BF (28), and I (19), are expecting a baby next August and are planning to have a baby shower in early spring. The original plan was to host the shower in May at a local park, but I forgot that everyone is going to be home for summer break by then. I have already been looking at baby shower themes and decorations online, although we don’t know the gender yet, since I am about 6 and 1/2 weeks along, so I am still very early. I have already created a guest list that includes my friends from college and coworkers from my BF’s place of work, including his general manager that we want to be the godmother. I am so excited to finally meet her since she is planning on moving down to Florida sometime soon and I don’t know when the next time I would be able to meet again her would be. While my guest list wasn’t particularly large or massive, I invited my closest friends from campus and wanted it to be a more small and intimate celebration. I have been talking about how happy I am living pregnant life with my friends and about the gender reveal party and baby shower nonstop. We are planning for the gender reveal party on my birthday, which is in March, since we will know by then and we won’t have to have another party. 3 of my friends, however, have gotten really annoyed about me talking about my pregnancy. One of them told me straight out, “we don’t want to hear about your pregnancy”. This comment really hurt me, considering I considered these three to be really close and supportive of me and my BF. I then told them that they were all uninvited. I told them that I let them talk about whatever they want and I don’t complain about it. I brought this is to one of my friend groups and they agreed that I always talk about it, though this didn’t make me mad. I expressed that this pregnancy and the baby IS my life now, and one of my friends in the group cautioned me to not make the baby my whole life. While I get where she is coming from, I have said that I am fully willing to make significant sacrifices and give up most of my social life for the sake of being an attentive and present parent. While I know that there is no thing called being “the best” parent, I am willing to be the best that I absolutely can be so my child doesn’t have to struggle like I did growing up, since I was born with a heart defect and was very sick during the first few years of my life, being in and out of hospitals for surgeries. I told my boyfriend about this incident and told him that I only want people there that will be happy for us. I asked him if I was in the wrong and he wasn’t sure. So Reddit, am I in the wrong here?
Wtf, a teenager gets knocked up by an adult and now wants to throw all their friends away for a guy and his baby.
This has to be a joke right.
Good luck YTA to yourself and this poor kid gonna be so messed up.
My guess is AI since the poster would have only know they’re pregnant for like….. 2 weeks at most and there’s no way they’re this far along in the planning of these things.
YTA. You’re only 6 1/2 weeks pregnant and talking about it so much that your friends are annoyed with you.
Also your 28 year old boyfriend knocking you up while you’re a teenager in college is making me majorly side eye him.
INFO: how long have you and your boyfriend been together??
YTA such an immature response to a situation. Then again I’d be way more concerned with the age gap & baby trap situation you’ve got yourself in.
YTA. You haven’t even had a sonogram yet and you’re talking about baby showers enough to annoy your friends. Slow down. Sounds like you have some growing up to do first.
Also your bf is getting you knocked up after only 2 months of being together? You realize you barely know each other.
YTA from the fact that you meet your bf and immediately got pregnant and are already planning both a baby shower and gender reveal party not even 2 months pregnant. You’re clearly talking non stop your friends should be able to talk about other things
A baby out of wedlock with a guy 50% older than you, and talking about it nonstop while only 1 week out past the time period considered biochemical pregnancy, and still in the time frame in which you have about a 1-6 chance of miscarrying, and a godmother who is your BF’s female coworker that you never met.
Yikes.
Your friends are right to be annoyed with you and concerned about the choices you are making. Most couples do not even announce pregnancies until the end of the first trimester when the odds of a successful delivery skyrocket. Never mind having guests lists to 2 parties at a point when you could theoretically just be having a late period. Implantation doesn’t even happen until week 4, how long have you been talking about being pregnant? Since the morning after he nut in you? You’ve been talking about it on Reddit for 12 days already, I’m annoyed with it and I don’t even know you.
YTA
YTA to yourself and your child. That is a whole ass person growing inside you and all you’re worried about is the parties you can throw…and in less than 2 weeks you e talked so much about yourself and the baby to your friends that they are already tired of it. A baby is not a toy or accessory. Every piece of your life is about to dramatically change forever and you’re already “picking out” shower decor. That’s not what’s important here!
Also you got pregnant within what had to be the first couple encounters with this guy, considering you claim you’re 6 weeks pregnant and have been together 2 months. You don’t know him and now you’re tied to him forever. And considering the age gap…the red flags have probably only started flying.
Wow. You sound way too immature to have a baby.
You are very early in your pregnancy and you describe yourself as talking all thing baby non stop. That is boring for most people, especially those in a different life stage. They can still be happy for you and not want to hear about it 24/7.
YTA
Girl youre not even 20 having a baby with a man 10 years older. Congrats, he’s babytrapped you for life. This is not a healthy relationship.
YTA. Your math is not mathing. How can you possibly be six and a half weeks pregnant now but the baby not be due until August? Be prepared to be surprised in July.
Having unprotected sex with a man you have only just met is wildly irresponsible and reckless in respect of your own health. I hope you won’t be so reckless in relation to this baby.
YTA.
If you make being a mother your whole personality, you will *not* be a good parent. Women who become so focused on their child often smother the child and alienate friends. Which does not model a healthy social life for the child.
Also *please* tell me you will continue school and not become a sahm. Youve only known this man for a few months– trust me, you do not know him. If you want to be a good mother you will be financially and emotionally independent. Even if your relationship works out.
I get your friends comment hurt. But also they are young women in college. Even if they support you, yeah, they dont want to hear about it 24/7. Again making this pregnancy your whole personality is unhealthy for a myriad of reasons.
>3 of my friends, however, have gotten really annoyed about me talking about my pregnancy. One of them told me straight out, “we don’t want to hear about your pregnancy”
if you’re 6 1/2 weeks pregnant, that means you’ve known you are pregnant for a max of 2-3 weeks. And you’ve already planned an entire party, and talked about it so much that people are telling you they don’t want to hear about it
YTA, it’s ok to be excited, but read the room