AITA for exposing my cousins criminal history

I recently attended a birthday party for a cousin I hadn’t seen in a long time. When I arrived I went in and gave my aunt a hug and wished my cousin a happy birthday but he seemed a little out of sorts. I asked him what was wrong and he looked at me and told me " Mum invited Leon man". Leon is his eldest brother and the only cousin older than me. He also served a disgustingly short prison sentence for Kidnapping, Murder and other things of an elderly woman. He was found guilty because the evidence was overwhelming but certain members of our family refuse to believe he did it and eat up everything excuse he feeds them about evidence.

Anyway my aunt comes up to me and tells me that we’re not mentioning anything to Leon’s new girlfriend about him going to prison because he hasn’t figured out how to explain it yet. Not long after that I met her and introduced myself questioning if I should say something. That’s when her 4 year old daughter came running up. That was it, I told her everything and showed her News articles

Needless to say they’re not together and I’ve received a torrent angry texts saying it wasn’t my place to say anything along with hysterical phone calls about me ruining everything, hasn’t he been through enough. I feel like I’m going crazy and any moral person should have done the same. So Am I the asshole?

14 thoughts on “AITA for exposing my cousins criminal history”
  1. NTA, saying “hasn’t he been through enough” is something to say about a crime victim, not a perpetrator. This family reminds me of the long whiney story Brock Turner’s father told about how sad it was that his son’s career as a swimmer was ruined. Yeah, because he raped an unconscious woman!

    1. I know that pissed me off. No he hasn’t been through enough he should still be in prison our justice system is a joke

  2. You are correct, you acted as any moral person would.

    His family is in deep denial, that is a different battle that you are a bystander for. Doesn’t change he was found legally guilty of kidnap and murder, and any partner deserves to know.

    NTA.

  3. You absolutely did the right thing. As a mother myself, i would immediately leave the relationship finding something like that out. That is a very dangerous situation for a women with a child to be in. You did the right thing and you are not the ass hole. He is!!!

    1. As a parent the idea of that animal being around children makes me feel seething rage and disgust in equal measure

  4. NTA. They asked you to hide a murder conviction from a woman with a young child. You protected her and her daughter. That’s the only moral choice. Stand firm.

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